


Beautiful Disaster

by Luan



Category: One Direction
Genre: Angst and Romance, Bad Boy Harry Styles, Falling In Love, Fluff, Frat Boy Harry Styles, Friendship/Love, Gay Sex, M/M, Multi, Other, Smut, True Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-03
Updated: 2019-07-03
Packaged: 2020-06-03 05:07:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 22,197
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19456993
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Luan/pseuds/Luan
Summary: “You know him, H. Zayn’s best friend? He was with us the other night,” Liam said.Harry smiled at me in what I assumed was his most charming expression. He oozed sex and rebelliousness with his buzzed brown hair and tattooed forearms, and I rolled my eyes at his attempt to lure me in.Harry spun the empty chair beside me and sat, resting his arms in front of him. “So you’re the baby bear of the group huh”“No,” I snapped. “I have a name.”He seemed amused at the way I regarded him, which only served to make me angrier.“Well? What is it?” he asked.I took a bite of the last apple spear on my plate, ignoring him.“Bear it is, then,” he said, shrugging.I glanced up at Zayn and then turned to Harry “I’m trying to eat here.”Harry settled in for the challenge I presented. “My name’s Harry. Harry Styles”OrHarry Styles lean, cut, and covered in tattoos, is exactly what Louis needs—and wants—to avoid. He spends his nights winning money in a floating fight ring, and his days as the ultimate college campus charmer





	1. Red Flag

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! This is one of my favorite books! its called Beautiful Disaster by Jamie McGuire. The only difference of course are the characters, and some minor details. Let me know if you guys like it so i can continue posting the chapters
> 
> X

Chapter one - RED FLAG

Everything in the room screamed that I didn’t belong. The stairs were crumbling, the rowdy patrons were shoulder to shoulder, and the air was a medley of sweat, blood and mold. Voices blurred as they yelled numbers and names back and forth, and arms flailed about, exchanging money and gestures to communicate over the noise. I squeezed through the crowd, following close behind my best friend.

“Keep your cash in your wallet, Lou!” Liam called to me. His broad smile gleamed even in the dim light.

“Stay close! It’ll get worse once it starts!” Liam yelled over the noise. Zayn grabbed his hand and then mine as Liam led us through the sea of people.

The sharp bleating of a bullhorn cut through the smoky air. The noise startled me, and I jumped in reaction, looking for the source of the blast. A man stood on a wooden chair, holding a wad of cash in one hand, the horn in the other. He held the plastic to his lips.

“Welcome to the blood bath! If you are looking for Economics 101…you are in the wrong fucking place, my friend! If you seek the Circle, this is Mecca! My name is Adam. I make the rules and I call the fight. Betting ends once the opponents are on the floor. No touching the fighters, no assistance, no bet switching, and no encroachment of the ring. If you break these rules, you will get the piss beat out of you and you will be thrown out on your ass without your money! That includes you, ladies! So don’t use your hos to scam the system, boys!”

Liam shook his head. “Jesus, Adam!” he yelled to the emcee over the noise, clearly disapproving of his friend’s choice of words.

My heart pounded in my chest. I promised zayn that I could handle whatever we happened upon, but at ground zero I felt the urge to grip his arms with both hands. He wouldn’t put me in any danger, but being in a basement with fifty or so drunken college boys intent on bloodshed and capital, I wasn’t exactly confident of our chances to leave unscathed.

After Zayn met Liam at freshman orientation, he frequently accompanied him to the secret fights held in different basements of Eastern University. Each event was held in a different spot, and kept secret until just an hour before the fight.

Because I ran in somewhat tamer circles, I was surprised to learn of an underground world at Eastern; but Liam knew about it before he had ever enrolled. Harry, Liam’s roommate and cousin, entered his first fight seven months before. As a freshman, he was rumored to be the most lethal competitor Adam had seen in the three years since creating the Circle. Beginning his sophomore year, Harry was unbeatable. Together, Harry and Liam easily paid their rent and bills with the winnings.

Adam brought the bullhorn to his mouth once again, and the yelling and movement escalated to a feverish pace.

“Tonight we have a new challenger! Eastern’s star varsity wrestler, Marek Young!”

Cheering ensued, and the crowd parted like the Red Sea when Marek entered the room. A circular space cleared, and the mob whistled, booed and taunted the contender. He bounced up and down and rocked his neck back and forth, his face severe and focused. The crowd quieted to a dull roar, and my hands shot to my ears when music blared through the large speakers on the other side of the room.

“Our next fighter doesn’t need an introduction, but because he scares the shit outta me, I’ll give him one, anyway! Shake in your boots, boys, and drop your panties, ladies! I give you: Harry ‘Mad Dog’ Styles!

The volume exploded when Harry appeared in a doorway across the room. He made his entrance, shirtless, relaxed and unaffected. He strolled into the center of the circle as if he were showing up to another day at work. Lean muscles stretched under his tattooed skin as he popped his fists against Marek’s knuckles. Harry leaned in and whispered something in Marek’s ear, and the wrestler struggled to keep his stern expression. Marek stood toe to toe with Harry, and they looked directly into each other’s eyes. Marek’s expression was murderous; harry looked mildly amused.

The men took a few steps back, and Adam sounded the horn. Marek took a defensive stance, and Harry attacked. I stood on my tiptoes when I lost my line of sight, leaning from side to side to get a better view. I inched up, sliding through the screaming crowd. Elbows jabbed into my sides, and shoulders rammed into me, bouncing me back and forth like a pinball. The tops of the fighers’ heads became visible, so I continued to push my way forward.

When I finally reached the front, Marek grabbed Harry with his thick arms and tried to throw him to the ground. When Marek leaned down with the motion, Harry rammed his knee into Marek’s face. Before Marek could shake off the blow, Harry lit into him, his fists making contact with Marek’s bloodied face over and over.

Five fingers sank into my arm and I jerked back.

“What the hell are you doing, Louis?” Liam said.

“I can’t see from back there!” I called to him.

I turned just in time to see Marek land a solid punch. Harry turned, and for a moment I thought he had dodged another blow, but he made a complete circle, crashing his elbow straight into the center of Marek’s nose. Blood sprayed my face, and splattered down the front of my cardigan. Marek fell to the concrete floor with a thud, and for a brief moment the room was completely silent.

Adam threw a scarlet square of fabric on Marek’s limp body, and the mob detonated. Cash changed hands once again, and the expressions divided into the smug and the frustrated.

I was pushed around with the movement of those coming and going. Zayn called my name from somewhere in the back, but I was mesmerized by the trail of red from my chest to my waist.

A pair of heavy black boots stepped in front of me, diverting my attention to the floor. My eyes traveled upward; jeans spattered with blood, a set of finely chiseled abs, a bare, tattooed chest drenched in sweat, and finally a pair of warm, brown eyes. I was shoved from behind, and Harry caught me by the arm before I fell forward.

“Hey! Back up off him!” Harry frowned, shoving anyone who came near me. His stern expression melted into a smile at the sight my shirt, and then he dabbed my face with a towel. “Sorry about that, Love.”

Adam patted the back of Harry’s head. “C’mon, Mad Dog! You have some dough waitin’ on ya!”

His eyes didn’t stray from mine. “It’s a damn shame about the sweater. It looks good on you.” In the next moment he was engulfed by fans, disappearing the way he came.

“What were you thinking, you idiot?” Zayn yelled, yanking my arm.

“I came here to see a fight, didn’t I?” I said, smiling

You aren’t even supposed to be here, Louis,” Liam scolded.

“Neither is Zayn,” I said.

“He doesn’t try to jump in the circle!” He frowned. “Let’s go.”

Zayn smiled at me and wiped my face. “You are such a pain in the ass, Lou. God, I love you!” He hooked his arm around my neck, and we made our way up the stairs and into the night.

Zayn followed me into my dorm room and then sneered at my roommate, Stan. I immediately peeled off the bloody cardigan, throwing it into the hamper.

“Gross. Where have you been?” Stan asked from his bed.

I looked to Zayn, who shrugged. “Nosebleed. You haven’t seen one of Lou’s famous nosebleeds?”

Stan pushed up his glasses and shook his head.

“Oh, you will.” He winked at me and then shut the door behind him. Less than a minute later, my cell phone chimed. Per her usual, Zayn texted me seconds after we had said goodbye.

“staying w liam c u 2morrow ring king”

I peeked at Stab who watched me as if my nose would gush at any moment.

“He was kidding,” I said.

Stan nodded with indifference and then looked down to the mess of books on his bedspread.

“I guess I’ll get a shower,” I said, grabbing a towel and my shower bag.

“I’ll alert the media,” Stan deadpanned, keeping his head down.

The next day, Liam and Zayn joined me for lunch. I had intended to sit alone, but as students filtered into the cafeteria, the chairs around me were filled by either Liam’s frat brothers or members of the football team. Some of them had been at the fight, but no one mentioned my ringside experience.

“Li,” a passing voice called.

Liam nodded, and Zayn and I both turned to see Harry take a seat at the end of the table. He was followed by two voluptuous bottle-brunettes wearing Sigma Kappa Ts. One of them sat on Harry’s lap, the other sat beside him, pawing at his shirt.

“I think I just threw up a little bit in my mouth,” Zayn muttered.

The brunette on Harrhy lap turned to Zayn. “I heard that, asshole.”

Zayn grabbed her roll and threw it down the table, narrowly missing the girl’s face. Before the girl could say another word, Harry let his knees give way, sending her tumbling to the floor.

“Ouch!” she squealed, looking up at Harry

Zayn’s a friend of mine. You need to find another lap, Kendall.

“Harry!” she whined, scrambling to her feet.

Harry turned his attention to his plate, ignoring her. She looked at her sister and huffed, and they left hand in hand.

Harry winked at Zayn and, as if nothing had happened, shoveled another bite into his mouth. It was then that I noticed a small cut on his eyebrow. He traded glances with Liam and then began a conversation with one of the football guys across from him.

Although the crowd at the lunch table had thinned, Zayn, Liam and I lingered to discuss our weekend plans. Harry stood up to leave but stopped at our end of the table.

“What?” Liam asked loudly, holding his hand to his ear.

I tried to ignore him for as long as possible, but when I looked up, Harry was staring at me.

“You know him, H. Zayn’s best friend? He was with us the other night,” Liam said.

Harry smiled at me in what I assumed was his most charming expression. He oozed sex and rebelliousness with his buzzed brown hair and tattooed forearms, and I rolled my eyes at his attempt to lure me in.

“Since when do you have a best friend, Zayn?” Harry asked.

“Since junior year dick” Zayn answered, pressing his lips together as he smiled in my direction. “Don’t you remember, Harry You ruined his sweater.”

Harry smiled. “I ruin a lot of sweaters.”

“Gross,” I muttered.

Harry spun the empty chair beside me and sat, resting his arms in front of him. “So you’re the baby bear of the group huh”

“No,” I snapped. “I have a name.”

He seemed amused at the way I regarded him, which only served to make me angrier.

“Well? What is it?” he asked.

I took a bite of the last apple spear on my plate, ignoring him.

“Bear it is, then,” he said, shrugging.

I glanced up at Zayn and then turned to Harry “I’m trying to eat here.”

Harry settled in for the challenge I presented. “My name’s Harry. Harry Styles”

I rolled my eyes. “I know who you are.”

“You do, huh?” Harry said, raising his wounded eyebrow.

“Don’t flatter yourself. It’s hard not to notice when fifty drunks are chanting your name. “

Harry sat up a bit taller. “I get that a lot.” I rolled my eyes again, and Harry chuckled. “Do you have a twitch?”

“A what?”

A twitch. Your eyes keep wiggling around.” He laughed again when I glared at him. “Those are some amazing eyes though,” he said, leaning just inches from my face. “What color is that, anyway? Turquoise ?”

I looked down to my plate, letting the long strands of my caramel hair create a curtain between us. I didn’t like the way it made me feel when he was so close. I didn’t want to be like the other scores of girls and bots at Eastern that blushed in his presence. I didn’t want him to affect me in that way at all.

“Don’t even think about it, Harry. He’s like my brother,” Zayn warned.

“Baby,” Liam said. “You just told him no. He’s never gonna stop, now.”

“You’re not his type,” he hedged.

Harry feigned offense. “I’m everyone’s type!”

I peeked over at him and smiled.

“Ah! A smile. I’m not a rotten bastard after all,” he winked. “It was nice to meet you, Bear” He walked around the table and leaned into Zayn’s ear.

Liam threw a french fry at his cousin. “Get your lips outta my boys ear, H!”

“Networking! I’m networking!” Harry walked backward with his hands up in an innocent gesture.

A few more girls followed behind him, giggling and running their fingers through their hair to get his attention. He opened the door for them, and they nearly squealed in delight.

Zayn laughed. “Oh, no. You’re in trouble, Lou .”

“What did he say?” I asked, wary.

He wants you to bring him to the apartment, doesn’t he?” Liam said. Zayb nodded and he shook his head. “You’re a smart boy, Lou. I’m telling you now, if you fall for his shit and then end up getting mad at him, you can’t take it out on me and Zayn, all right?”

I smiled. “I won’t fall for it, Li. Do I look like one of the Barbie twins to you?”

“He won’t fall for it,” Zayn assured him, touching his arm.

“This isn’t my first rodeo, Babe. Do you know how many times he’s screwed things up for me because he one-nights the best friend? All of a sudden it’s a conflict of interest to date me because it’s fraternizing with the enemy! I’m tellin’ ya, Lou,” he looked at me, “don’t tell Zayn he can’t come over or date me because you fall for Harry’s line of BS. Consider yourself warned.”

“Unnecessary, but appreciated,” I said. I tried to assure Liam with a smile, but his pessimism was driven by years of being burned by Harry’s endeavors.

Zayn waved, leaving with Liam as I walked to my afternoon class. I squinted in the bright sun, gripping my backpack straps. Eastern was exactly what I hoped it would be, from the smaller classrooms to the unfamiliar faces. It was a new start for me; I could finally walk somewhere without the whispers of those who knew—or thought they knew—anything about my past. I was as indistinguishable as any other wide-eyed, overachieving freshman on the way to class; no staring, no rumors, no pity or judgment. Only the illusion of what I wanted them to see: cashmered, no-nonsense Louis Tomlinson.

I sat my backpack on the floor and collapsed into the chair, bending down to fish my laptop from my bag. When I popped up to set it on my desk, harry slid behind the next desk.

“Good. You can take notes for me,” he said. He chewed on the pen in his mouth and smiled, undoubtedly his most charming.

I shot a disgusted look at him. “You’re not even in this class.”

“The hell if I’m not. I usually sit up there,” he said, nodding to the top row. A small group of girls were staring at me, and I noticed an empty chair in the center.

“I’m not taking notes for you,” I said, booting up my computer.

Harry leaned so close that I could feel his breath on my cheek. “I’m sorry…did I offend you in some way?”

I sighed and shook my head.

“Then what is your problem?”

I kept my voice low. “I’m not sleeping with you. You should give up, now.”

A slow smile crept across his face before he spoke. “I haven’t asked you sleep with me.” His eyes drifted to the ceiling in thought. “Have I?”

“I’m not a Barbie twink or one of your little groupies up there,” I said, glancing at the girls behind us. “I’m not impressed with your tattoos or your boyish charm or your forced indifference, so you can stop the antics, okay?”

“Okay, bear.” He was infuriatingly impervious to my rudeness. “Why don’t you come over with Zayn tonight?” I sneered at his request, but he leaned closer. “I’m not trying to bag you. I just wanna hang out.”

“Bag me? How do you ever get laid talking like that?”

Harry burst into laughter, shaking his head. “Just come over. I won’t even flirt with you, I swear.”

“I’ll think about it.”

Professor Chaney strolled in, and Harry turned his attention to the front of the room. A residual smile lingered on his face, making the dimple in his cheek sink in. The more he smiled, the more I wanted to hate him, and yet it was the very thing that made hating him impossible.

“Who can tell me which president had a cross-eyed wife with a bad case of the uglies?” Chaney asked.

“Make sure you get that down,” Harry whispered. “I’m gonna need to know that for job interviews.”

Sshh,” I said, typing Chaney’s every word.

Harry grinned and relaxed into his chair. As the hour progressed, he alternated between yawning and leaning against my arm to look at my monitor. I made a concentrated effort to ignore him, but his proximity and the muscles bulging from his arm made it difficult. He picked at the black leather band around his wrist until Chaney dismissed us.

I hurried out the door and down the hall. Just when I felt sure I was a safe distance, Harry styles was at my side.

“Have you thought about it?” he asked, slipping on his sunglasses.

A petite brunette stepped in front of us, wide-eyed and hopeful. “Hey, Harry,” he said

I paused, recoiling from his sugary tone, and then walked around him. I’d seen him before, talking normally in the commons area of the boys dorm. His tone sounded much more mature then, and I wondered what it was about a toddler’s voice he thought Harry would find appealing. He babbled in a higher octave for a bit longer until he was next to me once again.

Pulling a lighter from his pocket, he lit a cigarette and blew out a thick cloud of smoke. “Where was I? Oh yeah…you were thinking.”

I grimaced. “What are you talking about?”

“Have you thought about coming over?”

“If I say yes, will you quit following me?”

He considered my stipulation and then nodded. “Yes.”

“Then I’ll come over.”

“When?”

I sighed. “Tonight. I’ll come over tonight.”

Harry smiled and stopped in his tracks. “Sweet. See you then, Bear,” he called after me.

I rounded the corner to see Zayn standing with Niall outside our dormitory. The three of us ended up at the same table at freshman orientation, and I knew he would be the welcome third wheel to our well-oiled machine. He wasn’t excessively tall, but still he towered over my five feet four inches. His round eyes offset his long, lean features, and his bleached hair was usually fashioned into a spike at the front.

“Harry Styles? Jesus, Lou, since when did you start fishing in the deep end?” Niall said with disapproving eyes.

Zayn pulled the gum from his mouth in a long string. “You’re only making it worse by brushing him off. He’s not used to that.”

“What do you suggest I do? Sleep with him?”

Zayn shrugged. “It’ll save time.”

“I told him I’d come over tonight.”

Niall and Zayn traded glances.

What? He promised to quit bugging me if I said yes. You’re going over there tonight, right?”

“Well, yeah,” Zayn said. “You’re really coming?”

I smiled and walked past them into the dorms, wondering if Harry would make good on his promise not to flirt. He wasn’t hard to figure out; he either saw me as a challenge, or safely unattractive enough to be a good friend. I wasn’t sure which bothered me more.

Four hours later, Zayn knocked on my door to take me to liam and Harry’s ’. She didn’t hold back when I walked into the hall.

“What the fuck Lou? You look homeless!”

“Good,” I said, smiling at my ensemble. I had bed hair and replaced my contacts with rectangular black-rimmed glasses. Sporting a ratty T-shirt and adidas sweatpants, I shuffled along in a pair of flip flops. The idea had come to me hours before that either way, unattractive was the best plan. Ideally, Harry would be instantly turned off and stop his ridiculous persistence. If he was looking for a buddy, I was aiming for too homely to be seen with.

Zayn rolled down her window and spit out her gum. “You’re so obvious. Why didn’t you just roll in dog shit to make your outfit complete?”

“I’m not trying to impress anyone,” I said.

“Obviously.”

We pulled into the parking lot of Liam’s apartment complex, and I followed Zayn to the stairs. Liam opened the door, laughing as I walked in. “What happened to you?”

“He’s trying to be unimpressive,” Zayn said. He followed Liam into his room. The door closed and I stood alone, feeling out of place. I sat in the recliner closest to the door and kicked off my flip-flops.

Their apartment was more aesthetically pleasing than the typical bachelor pad. The predictable posters of half-naked women and men and stolen street signs were on the walls, but it was clean, the furniture was new, and the smell of stale beer and dirty clothes was notably absent.

“It’s about time you showed up,” Harry said, collapsing onto the couch.

I smiled and pushed my glasses up the bridge of my nose, waiting for him to recoil at my appearance. “Zayn had a paper to finish.”

“Speaking of papers, have you started the one for History, yet?”

He didn’t bat an eye at my messy hair, and I frowned at his reaction. “Have you?”

“I finished it this afternoon.”

“It’s not due until next Wednesday,” I said, surprised.

“I just plugged it out. How hard can a two-page essay on Grant be?”

“I’m a procrastinator, I guess,” I shrugged. “I probably won’t start on it until this weekend.”

“Well, if you need help just let me know.”

I waited for him to laugh, or to show some sign that he was joking, but his expression was sincere. I raised an eyebrow. “You’re going to help me with my paper?”

“I have an A in that class,” he said, a bit miffed at my disbelief.

“He has As in all his classes. He’s a freakin’ genius. I hate him,” Liam said as he led Zayn into the living room by the hand.

I watched Harry with a dubious expression and his eyebrows shot up. “What? You don’t think a guy covered in tats and that trades punches for a living can get the grades? I’m not in school because I have nothing better to do.”

“Why do you have to fight at all, then? Why didn’t you try for scholarships?” I asked.

“I did. I was awarded half my tuition. But there are books, living expenses, and I gotta come up with the other half sometime. I’m serious, Bear. If you need help with anything, just ask.”

I don’t need your help. I can write a paper.” I wanted to leave it at that. I should have left it at that, but the new side of him he’d revealed gnawed at my curiosity. “You can’t find something else to do for a living? Less—I don’t know—sadistic?”

Harry shrugged. “It’s an easy way to make a buck. I can’t make that much working at the mall.”

“I wouldn’t say it’s easy if you’re getting hit in the face.”

“What? You’re worried about me?” he winked. I made a face and he chuckled. “I don’t get hit that often. If they swing, I move. It’s not that hard.”

I laughed once. “You act as if no one else has come to that conclusion.”

“When I throw a punch they take it and try to reciprocate. That’s not gonna win a fight.”

I rolled my eyes. “What are you, the Karate Kid? Where did you learn to fight?”

Liam and Zayn glanced at each other, and then their eyes wandered to the floor. It didn’t take long to recognize I had said something wrong.

Harry didn’t seem affected. “I had a dad with a drinking problem and a bad temper, and four older brothers that carried the asshole gene.”

“Oh.” My ears smoldered.

“Don’t be embarrassed, Bear. Dad quit drinking, the brothers grew up.”

“I’m not embarrassed.” I fidgeted with the falling strands of my hair and smooth it , trying to ignore the awkward silence.

“I like the au naturel thing you have going on. Boys and girls don’t come over here like that.”

“I was coerced into coming here. It didn’t occur to me to impress you,” I said, irritated that my plan had failed.

He smiled his boyish, amused grin, and I turned up my anger a notch, hoping it would cover my unease. I didn’t know how most boys and even girls felt around him, but I’d seen how they behaved. I was experiencing more of a disoriented, nauseated feeling than giggly infatuation, and the harder he worked to make me smile, the more unsettled I felt.

“I’m already impressed. I don’t normally have to beg boys to come to my apartment.”

“I’m sure,” I said, screwing my face into disgust. “So..You’re bisexual,right?”

“I hate labels Lou.. i like people”

“Lou” it was the first time he called me Lou, he normally calls me Bear or any other pet names but hearing my name come out his mouth left me unsettled 

He was the worst kind of confident. Not only was he shamelessly aware of his appeal, he was so used to people throwing themselves at him that he regarded my cool demeanor as refreshing instead of an insult. I would have to change my strategy.

Zayn pointed the remote at the television and switched it on. “There’s a good movie on tonight. Anyone want to find out where Baby Jane is?”

Harry stood up. “I was just heading out for dinner. You hungry, Bear?”

“I already ate,” I shrugged.

“No you haven’t,” Zayn said before realizing his mistake. “Oh…er…that’s right, I forgot you grabbed a…pizza? Before we left.”

I grimaced at his miserable attempt to fix his blunder, and then waited for Harry’s ’ reaction.

He walked across the room and opened the door. “C’mon. You’ve gotta be hungry.”

“Where are you going?”

“Wherever you want. We can hit a pizza place.”

I looked down at my clothes. “I’m not really dressed.”

He appraised me for a moment and then grinned. “You look fine. Let’s go, I’m starvin’.”

I stood up and waved to Zayn, passing Harry to walk down the stairs. I stopped in the parking lot, watching in horror as he straddled a matte black motorcycle.

“Uh…” I trailed off, scrunching my exposed toes.

He shot an impatient glare in my direction. “Oh, get on. I’ll go slow.”

“What is that?” I asked, reading the writing on the gas tank too late.

“It’s a Harley Night Rod. She’s the love of my life, so don’t scratch the paint when you get on.”

“I’m wearing flip-flops!”

Harry stared at me as if I’d spoken a foreign language. “I’m wearing boots. Get on.”

He slipped on his sunglasses, and the engine snarled when he brought it to life. I climbed on and reached behind me for something to grab on to, but my fingers slipped from leather to the plastic cover of the taillight.

Harry grabbed my wrists and wrapped them around his middle. “There’s nothing to hold on to but me, Love. Don’t let go,” he said, pushing the bike backward with his feet. With a flick of his wrist, he pulled onto the street, and took off like a rocket. The pieces of my hair that hung loose beat against my face, and I ducked behind Harry, knowing I would end up with bug guts on my glasses if I looked over his shoulder.

He gunned the throttle when we pulled into the driveway of the restaurant, and once he slowed to a stop, I wasted no time scrambling to the safety of the concrete.

“You’re a lunatic!”

Harry chuckled, leaning his bike onto its kickstand before dismounting. “I went the speed limit.”

“Yeah, if we were on the Autobahn!” I said, fixing my hair

Harry watched me pull hair away from my face and then walked to the door, holding it open. “I wouldn’t let anything happen to you, Bear.”

I stormed past him into the restaurant, my head not quite in sync with my feet. Grease and herbs filled the air as I followed him across the red, breadcrumb-speckled carpet. He chose a booth in the corner, away from the patches of students and families, and then ordered two beers. I scanned the room, watching the parents coaxing their boisterous children to eat, and looking away from the inquisitive glances of Eastern students.

“Sure, Harry” the waitress said, writing down our drink orders. She looked a bit high from his presence as she returned to the kitchen.

I tucked the windblown hairs behind my ears, suddenly embarrassed by my appearance. “Come here often?” I asked acerbically.

Harry leaned on the table with his elbows, his brown eyes fixated on mine. “So what’s your story, Lou? Are you a man-hater in general, or do you just hate me?”

“I think it’s just you.. love” I grinned at him.

He laughed once, amused at my mood. “I can’t figure you out. You’re the first boy that’s ever been disgusted with me before sex. You don’t get all flustered when you talk to me, and you don’t try to get my attention.”

“It’s not a ploy. I just don’t like you.”

“You wouldn’t be here if you didn’t like me.”

My frown involuntarily smoothed and I sighed. “I didn’t say you’re a bad person. I just don’t like being a foregone conclusion for the sole reason you’re into dicks and i have one” I focused on the grains of salt on the table until I heard a choking noise from Harry’ direction.

His eyes widened and he quivered with howling laughter. “Oh my God! You’re killing me! That’s it. We have to be friends. I won’t take no for an answer.”

“I don’t mind being friends, but that doesn’t mean you have to try to get in my pants every five seconds.”

“You’re not sleeping with me. I get it.”

I tried not to smile, but failed.

His eyes brightened. “You have my word. I won’t even think about your dick…unless you want me to.”

I rested my elbows on the table and leaned into them. “And that won’t happen, so we can be friends.”

An impish grin sharpened his features as he leaned in a bit closer. “Never say never.”

“So what’s your story?” I asked. “Have you always been Harry ‘Mad Dog’ Styles or is that just since you came here?” I used two fingers on each hand as quotation marks when I said his nickname, and for the first time his confidence waned. He looked a bit embarrassed.

“No. Adam started that after my first fight.”

His short answers were beginning to bug me. “That’s it? You’re not going to tell me anything about yourself?”

“What do you wanna know?”

“The normal stuff. Where you’re from, what you want to be when you grow up…things like that.”

“I’m from here, born and raised, and I’m a criminal justice major.”

With a sigh, he unrolled his silverware and straightened them beside his plate. He looked over his shoulder, his jaw tense. Two tables seating the Eastern soccer team erupted in laughter, and Harry seemed to be annoyed at what they were laughing about.

“You’re joking,” I said in disbelief.

“No, I’m a local,” he said, distracted.

“I meant about your major. You don’t look like the criminal justice type.”

His eyebrows pulled together, suddenly focused on our conversation. “Why?”

I scanned the tattoos covering his arm. “I’ll just say that you seem more criminal and less justice.”

“I don’t get in any trouble…for the most part. Dad was pretty strict.”

“Where was your mom?”

“She died when I was a kid,” he said, matter-of-fact.

“I’m…I’m sorry,” I said, shaking my head. His answer caught me off guard.

He dismissed my sympathy. “I don’t remember her. My brothers do, but I was just three when she died.”

“Four brothers, huh? How did you keep them straight?” I teased.

“I kept them straight by who hit the hardest, which also happened to be oldest to youngest. Thomas; the twins, Taylor and Tyler; and then Trenton. You never, ever got caught alone in a room with Taylor and Ty. I learned half of what I do in the Circle from them. Trenton was the smallest, but he’s fast. He’s the only one that can land a punch on me now.”

I shook my head, dumbfounded at the thought of five Harry’s running around in one household. “Do they all have tattoos?”

“Pretty much. Except Thomas. He’s an ad exec in California.”

“And your dad? Where’s he?”

“Around,” he said. His jaws were working again, increasingly irritated with the soccer team.

“What are they laughing about?” I asked, gesturing to the rowdy table. He shook his head, clearly not wanting to share. I crossed my arms and squirmed in my seat, nervous about what they were saying that caused him so much aggravation. “Tell me.”

“They’re laughing about me having to take you to dinner, first. It’s not usually…my thing.”

“First?” When the realization settled on my face, Harry winced at my expression. I spoke before I thought. “And I was afraid they were laughing about you being seen with me dressed like this, and they think I’m going to sleep with you,” I grumbled.

“Why wouldn’t I be seen with you?”

“What were we talking about?” I asked, warding off the heat rising under my cheeks.

“You. What’s your major?” he asked.

“Oh, er…General Ed, for now. I’m still undecided, but I’m leaning toward Accounting.”

“You’re not a local, though. You must be a transplant.”

“Wichita. Same as Zayn.”

“How did you end up here from Kansas?”

I picked at the label of my beer bottle. “We just had to get away.”

“From what?”

“My parents.”

“Oh. What about Zayn? He has parent issues, too?”

“No, Mark and Pam are great. They practically raised me. He sort of tagged along; he didn’t want me to come alone.”

Harry nodded. “So, why Eastern?”

“What’s with the third degree?” I said. The questions were drifting from small talk to personal, and I was beginning to get uncomfortable.

Several chairs knocked together as the soccer team left their seats. They traded one last joke before they meandered toward the door. Their pace quickened when Harry stood up. Those in the back of the group pushed those in front to escape before Harry made his way across the room. He sat down, forcing the frustration and anger away.

I raised an eyebrow.

“You were going to say why you chose Eastern,” he prompted.

“It’s hard to explain,” I said, shrugging. “I guess it just felt right.”

He smiled as he opened his menu. “I know what you mean.”


	2. PIG

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Did you study?” I asked.
> 
> “God, no. I spent the night reassuring my boyfriend that you weren’t going to sleep with harry”
> 
> “Jesus, Li . You’ve got it that bad, huh?” Harry asked, throwing a packet of ketchup at his cousin. Liam didn’t answer, but I smiled appreciatively at Harry for the diversion.
> 
> Zayn rubbed his back. “He’s going to be okay. It’s just going to take him a while to believe Lou is resistant to your charms.”
> 
> “I haven’t tried to charm him” Harry seeming offended. “He’s my friend.”
> 
> I looked at Liam. “I told you. You have nothing to worry about.”

PIG

Familiar faces filled the seats of our favorite lunch table. Zayn sat on one side of me, Niall on the other, and the rest of the spaces were picked off by Liam and his Sigma Tau brothers. It was hard to hear with the low roar inside the cafeteria, and the air conditioner seemed to be on the fritz again. The air was thick with the smell of fried food and sweaty skin, but somehow everyone seemed to be more energetic than usual.

“Hey Brazil,” Liam said, greeting the man sitting in front of me. His olive skin and chocolate eyes offset the white Eastern Football hat pulled low on his forehead.

“Missed you after the game on Saturday, Li” I drank a beer or six for ya,” he said with a broad white grin.

“I appreciate it. I took Zayn out to dinner,” he said, leaning over to kiss the top of Zayn’s head.

“You’re sittin’ in my chair, Brazil.”

Brazil turned to see Harry standing behind him, and then looked to me, surprised. “Oh, is he one of your boys, H?”

“Absolutely not,” I said, shaking my head.

Brazil looked to Harry, who stared at him expectantly. Brazil shrugged and then took his tray to the end of the table.

Harry smiled at me as he settled into the seat. “What’s up, Bear?”

“What is that?” I asked, unable to look away from his tray. The mystery food on his plate looked like a wax display.

Harry laughed and took a drink from his water glass. “The cafeteria ladies scare me. I’m not about to critique their cooking skills.”

I didn’t miss the appraising eyes of those sitting at the table. Harry’s behavior piqued their curiosity, and I subdued a smile at being the only boy they had seen him insist on sitting with.

“Ugh…that Bio test is after lunch,” Zayn groaned.

“Did you study?” I asked.

“God, no. I spent the night reassuring my boyfriend that you weren’t going to sleep with Harry.”

The football players seated at the end of our table stopped their obnoxious laughter to listen more closely, making the other students take notice. I glared at Zayn, but he was unconcerned with any blame, nudging Liam with his shoulder.

“Jesus, Li . You’ve got it that bad, huh?” Harry asked, throwing a packet of ketchup at his cousin. Liam didn’t answer, but I smiled appreciatively at Harry for the diversion.

Zayn rubbed his back. “He’s going to be okay. It’s just going to take him a while to believe Lou is resistant to your charms.”

“I haven’t tried to charm him” Harry seeming offended. “He’s my friend.”

I looked at Liam. “I told you. You have nothing to worry about.”

Liam finally met my eyes, and upon seeing my sincere expression, his eyes brightened a bit.

“Did you study?” Harry asked me.

I frowned. “No amount of studying is going to help me with Biology. It’s just not something I can wrap my head around.”

Harry stood up. “C’mon.”

“What?”

“Let’s go get your notes. I’m going to help you study.”

“Harry…”

“Get your ass up, Bear. You’re gonna to ace that test.”

I ruffled Zayn’s hair. “See you in class, Z.”

He smiled. “I’ll save you a seat. I’ll need all the help I can get.”

Harry followed me to my room, and I pulled out my study guide while he popped open my book. He quizzed me relentlessly, and then clarified a few things I didn’t understand. In the way that he explained it, the concepts went from being confusing to obvious.

“…and somatic cells use mitosis to reproduce. That’s when you have the phases. They sound sort of like a woman’s name: Prometa Anatela.”

I laughed. “Prometa Anatela?”

“Prophase, metaphase, anaphase and telophase.”

“Prometa Anatela,” I repeated, nodding.

He smacked the top of my head with the papers. “You got this. You know this study guide backwards and forward.”

I sighed. “Well…we’ll see.”

“I’m going to walk you to class. I’ll quiz you on the way.”

I locked the door behind us. “You’re not going to be mad if I flunk this test, are you?”

“You’re not going to flunk. We need to start earlier for the next one, though,” he said, keeping in step with me to the science building.

“How are you going to tutor me, do your homework, study and train for your fights?”

Harry chuckled. “I don’t train for my fights. Adam calls me, tells me where the fight is, and I go.”

I shook my head in disbelief as he held the paper in front of him to ask the first question. We nearly finished a second round of the study guide when we reached my class.

“Kick ass,” he smiled, handing me the notes and leaning against the doorjamb.

“Hey Harry.”

I turned to see a tall, somewhat lanky man smile at Harry on his way into the classroom.

“Nick” Harry nodded.

Nick’s eyes brightened a bit when he looked to me, and he smiled. “Hi,Louis.”

“Hi,” I said, surprised that he knew my name. I had seen him in class, but we’d never met.

Nick continued to his seat, joking with those sitting beside him. “Who’s that?” I asked.

Harry shrugged, but the skin around his eyes seemed tenser than before. “Nick Grimshaw. He’s one of my Sig Tau brothers.”

“You’re in a frat?” I asked, doubtful.

“Sigma Tau, same as Li. I thought you knew that,” he said, looking beyond me to Nick. 

“Well…you don’t seem the…fraternity type,” I said, eyeing the tattoos on his forearms.

Harry turned his attention to me and grinned. “My dad is an alumnus, and my brothers are all Sig Tau. It’s a family thing.”

“And they expected you to pledge?” I asked, skeptical.

“Not really. They’re just good guys,” he said, flicking my papers. “Better get to class.”

“Thanks for helping me,” I said, nudging him with my elbow. Zayn passed, and I followed him to our seats.

“How did it go?” He asked.

I shrugged. “He’s a good tutor.”

“Just a tutor?”

“He’s a good friend, too.”

He seemed disappointed, and I giggled at the fallen expression on her face.

It had always been a dream of Zayn’s for us to date friends, and roommates-slash-cousins, for him it was hitting the jackpot. He wanted us to room together when he decided to come with me to Eastern, but I vetoed his idea, hoping to spread my wings a bit. Once he finished pouting, he focused on finding a friend of Liam’s s to introduce me to.

Harry’s healthy interest in me had surpassed his ideas.

I breezed through the test and sat on the steps outside the building, waiting for Zayn. When he slumped down beside me in defeat, I waited for him to speak.

“That was awful!” He cried.

“You should study with us. Harry explains it really well.”

Zayn groaned and leaned his head on my shoulder. “You were no help at all! Couldn’t you have given me a courtesy nod or something?” I hooked my arm around his neck and walked him to our dorm.

· · ·

Over the next week, Harry helped with my history paper and tutored me in Biology. We stood together scanning the grade board outside Professor Campbell’s office. My student number was three spots from the top.

“Third-highest test grade in the class! Nice, Bear!” he said, squeezing me. His eyes were bright with excitement and pride, and an awkward feeling made me take a step back.

“Thanks, H. Couldn’t have done it without you,” I said, pulling on his T-shirt.

He tossed me over his shoulder, making his way through the crowd behind us. “Make way! Move it, people! Let’s make room for this poor man hideously disfigured, ginormous brain! He’s a fucking genius!”

I giggled at the amused and curious expressions of my classmates.

· · ·

As the days went by, we fielded the persistent rumors about a relationship. Harry’s reputation helped to quiet the gossip. He had never been known to stay with one boy or girl longer than a night, so the more times we were seen together, the more people understood our platonic relationship for what it was. Even with the constant questions of our involvement, the stream of attention Harry received from his coeds didn’t recede.

He continued to sit next to me in History and eat with me at lunch. It didn’t take long to realize I had been wrong about him, even finding myself defensive toward those that didn’t know Harry the way that I did.

In the cafeteria, Harry set a can of orange juice in front of me.

“You didn’t have to do that. I was going to grab one,” I said, peeling off my jacket.

“Well, now you don’t have to,” he said, flashing the dimple on his left cheek.

Brazil snorted. “Did he turn you into a cabana boy, Harry? What’s next, fanning him with a palm tree leaf, wearing a Speedo?”

Harry shot him a murderous glare, and I jumped to his defense. “You couldn’t fill a Speedo, Brazil. Shut the hell up.”

“Easy, Louis! I was kidding!” Brazil said, holding up his hands.

“Just…don’t talk about him like that,” I said, frowning.

Harry’s expression was a mixture of surprise and gratitude. “Now I’ve seen it all. I was just defended by a boy,” he said, standing up. Before he left with his tray, he offered one more warning glare to Brazil, and then walked outside to stand with a small group of fellow smokers outside the building.

I tried not to watch him while he laughed and talked. Every girl in the group subtly competed for the space next to him, and Zayn shoved his elbow in my ribs when he noticed my attention was elsewhere.

“Whatcha lookin’ at, Lou?”

“Nothing. I’m not looking at anything.”

He rested his chin on his hand and shook his head. “They’re so obvious. Look at the redhead. She’s run her fingers through her hair as many times as she’s blinked. I wonder if Harry gets tired of that.”

Liam nodded. “He does. Everyone thinks he’s this asshole, but if they only knew how much patience he has dealing with every girl .. and boy that thinks they can tame him…He can’t go anywhere without them bugging him. Trust me; he’s much more polite than I would be.”

“Oh, like you wouldn’t love it,” Zayn said, kissing his cheek.

Harry was finishing his cigarette outside the cafeteria when I passed. “Wait up, Bear, I’ll walk you.”

“You don’t have to walk me to every class, Harry. I know how to get there on my own.”

Harry was easily sidetracked by a boy with long black hair. He walked by, smiling at him. He followed him with his eyes and nodded in the boys direction, throwing down his cigarette.

“I’ll catch up with you later, Bear.”

“Yeah,” I said, rolling my eyes as he jogged to the boys side.

Harry’s seat remained empty during class, and I found myself a bit irritated with him for missing over a boy he didn’t know. Professor Chaney dismissed early, and I hurried across the lawn, aware that I was to meet Niall at three to give him Sherri Cassidy’s Music Appreciation notes. I looked at my watch and quickened my pace.

“Louis?”

Nick jogged across the grass to walk beside me. “I don’t think we’ve officially met,” he said, holding out his hand. “Nick Grimshaw.”

I took his hand and smiled. “Louis Tomlinson.”

“I was behind you when you got your Bio test grade. Congratulations,” he smiled, shoving his hands in his pockets.

“Thanks. Harry helped, or I would’ve been at the bottom of that list, trust me.”

“Oh, are you guys…?”

“Friends.”

Nick nodded and smiled. “Did he tell you there’s a party at the House this weekend?”

“We mostly just talk about Biology and food.”

Nick laughed. “That sounds like Harry.”

At the door of Morgan Hall, Nick scanned my face with his big green eyes. “You should come. It’ll be fun.”

“I’ll talk to Zayn. I don’t think we have any plans.”

“Are you a package deal?”

“We made a pact this summer. No parties solo.”

“Smart.” He nodded in approval.

“He met Liam at orientation, so I haven’t really had to tag along with him much. This will be the first time I’ve needed to ask him, so I’m sure he’ll be happy to come.” I inwardly cringed. Not only was I babbling, I’d made it obvious that I didn’t get asked to parties.

“Great. I’ll see you there,” he said. He flashed his perfect Banana Republic model smile with his square jaw and naturally tan skin, turning to walk across campus.

I watched him walk away; he was tall, clean-shaven, with a pressed pin-striped dress shirt and jeans. His wavy dark blond hair bounced when he walked.

I bit my lip, flattered by his invitation.

“Now he’s more your speed,” Niall said in my ear.

“He’s cute, huh?” I asked, unable to stop smiling.

“Hell, yes. In that preppy, missionary-position kind of way.”

“Niall!” I cried, smacking him on the shoulder.

“Did you get Sherri’s notes?”

“I did,” I said, pulling them from my bag. He lit a cigarette, held it between his lips, and squinted at the papers.

“Fucking brilliant,” he said, scanning the pages. He folded them away in his pocket, and then took another drag. “Good thing Morgan’s boilers are out. You’ll need a cold shower after getting ogled by that tall drink of water.”

“The dorm doesn’t have hot water?” I wailed.

“That’s the word,” Niall said, sliding his backpack over his shoulder. “I’m off to Algebra. Tell Zayn I said not to forget me this weekend.”

“I’ll tell him,” I grumbled, glaring up the antique brick walls of our dormitory. I stomped up to my room, pushed through my door, and let my backpack fall to the floor.

“No hot water,” Stan mumbled from his side of the desk.

“I heard.”

My cell phone buzzed and I clicked it open, reading a text message from Zayn cursing the boilers. A few moments later there was a knock on the door.

Zayn walked in and plopped onto my bed, arms crossed. “Can you believe this shit? How much are we paying and we can’t even take a hot shower?”

Stan sighed. “Stop whining. Why don’t you just stay with your boyfriend? Haven’t you been staying with him, anyway?”

Zayn’s eyes darted in Stan’s direction. “Good idea, Stan. The fact that you’re a total ass comes in handy sometimes.”

Stan kept his eyes on his computer monitor, unfazed by Zayn’s jab.

Zayn pulled out his cell phone and clicked out a text message with amazing precision and speed. His cell phone chirped, and he smiled at me. “We’re staying with Liam and Harry until they fix the boilers.”

“What? I’m not!” I cried.

“Oh, yes you are. There’s no reason for you to be stuck here freezing in the shower when Harry and Li have two bathrooms at their place.”

“I wasn’t invited.”

“I’m inviting you. Li already said it was fine. You can sleep on the couch…if Harry isn’t using it.”

“And if he’s using it?”

Zayn shrugged. “Then you can sleep in Harry’s ’ bed.”

“No way!”

He rolled his eyes. “Don’t be such a baby, Lou. You guys are friends, right? If he hasn’t tried anything by now, I don’t think he will.”

His words made my open mouth snap shut. Harry had been around me in one way or another every night for weeks. I had been so occupied with making sure everyone knew we were just friends, it hadn’t occurred to me that he really was interested only in friendship. I wasn’t sure why, but I felt insulted.

Stan looked at us with disbelief. “Harry Styles hasn’t tried to sleep with you?”

“We’re friends!” I said in a defensive tone.

“I know, but he hasn’t even tried? He’s slept with everyone.”

“Except us,” Zayn said, looking over. “And you.”

Stan shrugged. “Well, I’ve never met him. I’ve just heard.”

“Exactly,” I snapped. “You don’t even know him.”

Stan returned to his monitor, oblivious to our presence.

I sighed. “All right, Z. I need to pack.”

“Make sure you pack for a few days: Who knows how long it will take them to fix the boilers?” He said, entirely too excited.

Dread settled over me as if I were about to sneak into enemy territory. “Ugh … all right.” Zayn bounced like a kid when he hugged me. “This is going to be so fun!”

Half an hour later we loaded down his Honda and headed for the apartment. Zayn hardly took a breath between ramblings as he drove. He honked his horn as he slowed to a stop in his usual parking space. Liam jogged down the steps and pulled both of our suitcases from the trunk, following us up the stairs.

“It’s open,” he puffed.

Zayn pushed the door and held it open. Liam grunted when he dropped our luggage to the floor. “Christ, babe! Your suitcase is twenty more pounds than Lou’s”

Zayn and I froze when a guy emerged from the bathroom, buttoning his shirt.

“Hi,” he said, surprised. His eyes examined us before settling on our luggage. I recognized him as the leggy brunette Harry had followed from the cafeteria.

Zayn glared at Liam.

He held up his hands. “He’s with Harry!”

Harry rounded the corner in a pair of boxer shorts and yawned. He looked at his guest and then patted his backside. “My company’s here. You’d better go.”

He smiled and wrapped his arms around him, kissing his neck. “I’ll leave my number on the counter.”

Eh…don’t worry about it,” Harry said in a casual tone.

“What?” He asked, leaning back to look in his eyes.

“Every time!” Zayn said. He looked at the guy. “How are you surprised by this? He’s Harry fucking Styles! He is famous for this very thing, and every time they’re surprised!” He said, turning to Liam. He put his arm around him gesturing for him to calm down.

The guy narrowed his eyes at Harry and then grabbed his things and stormed out, slamming the door behind him

Harry walked into the kitchen and opened the fridge as if nothing had happened.

Zayn shook his head and walked down the hall. Liam followed him angling his body to compensate for the weight of his suitcase as he trailed behind.

I collapsed against the recliner and sighed, wondering if I was crazy for agreeing to come. I didn’t realize Liam’s apartment was a revolving door for clueless people

Harry stood behind the breakfast bar, crossed his arms over his chest, and smiled. “What’s wrong, Bear? Hard day?”

“No, I’m thoroughly disgusted.”

“With me?” He was smiling. I should have known that he expected the conversation. It only made me less inclined to hold back.

“Yes, you. How can you just use someone like that and treat them that way?”

“How did I treat him? He offered his number, I declined.”

My mouth fell open at his lack of remorse. “You’ll have sex with him, but you won’t take his number?”

Harry leaned on the counter with his elbows. “Why would I want his number if I’m not going to call him?”

“Why would you sleep with him if you’re not going to call him?”

“I don’t promise anyone anything, Bear. He didn’t stipulate a relationship before he spread eagle on my couch.”

I stared at the couch with revulsion. “He’s someone’s child Harry. What if, down the line, someone treats your daughter or son like that?”

“My children better not drop their clothes for some jackass they’ve just met, let’s put it that way.”

I crossed my arms, angry that he made sense. “So, besides admitting that you’re a jackass, you’re saying that because he slept with you, he deserved to be tossed out like a stray cat?”

“I’m saying that I was honest with him. He’s an adult, it was consensual … he was a little too eager about it, if you want to know the truth. You act like I committed a crime.”

“He didn’t seem as clear about your intentions, Harry.”

“People usually justify their actions with whatever they make up in their heads. He didn’t tell me upfront that he expected a relationship any more than I told him I expected sex with no strings. How is it any different?”

“You’re a pig.”

Harry shrugged. “I’ve been called worse.”

I stared at the couch, the cushions still askew and bunched up from its recent use. I recoiled at the thought of how many people had given themselves away against the fabric. Itchy fabric at that.

“I guess I’m sleeping on the recliner,” I grumbled.

“Why?”

I glared at him, furious over his confused expression. “I’m not sleeping on that thing! God knows what I’d be lying in!”

He lifted my luggage off the floor. “You’re not sleeping on the couch or the recliner. You’re sleeping in my bed.”

“Which is more unsanitary than the couch, I’m sure.”

“There’s never been anyone in my bed but me.”

I rolled my eyes. “Give me a break!”

“I’m absolutely serious. I fuck ‘em on the couch. I don’t let them in my room.”

“Then why am I allowed in your bed?”

One corner of his mouth pulled up into an impish grin. “Are you planning on having sex with me tonight?”

“No!”

“That’s why. Now get your cranky ass up, take your hot shower, and then we can study some Bio.”

I glared at him for a moment and then grudgingly did as he commanded. I stood under the shower entirely too long, letting the water wash away my aggravation. Massaging the shampoo through my hair, I sighed at how wonderful it was to shower in a noncommunal bathroom again—no flip-flops, no toiletry bag, just the relaxing blend of water and steam.

The door opened, and I jumped. “Z?”

“No, it’s me,” Harry said.

I automatically wrapped my arms over my body. “What are you doing in here? Get out!”

“You forgot a towel, and I brought your clothes, and your toothbrush, and some weird face cream I found in your bag.”

“You went through my stuff?” I shrieked. He didn’t answer. Instead, I heard the faucet turn on and the sound of his toothbrush against his teeth.

I peeked out of the plastic curtain, holding it against my chest. “Get out, Harry”

He looked up at me, his lips covered in suds from his toothpaste. “I can’t go to bed without brushing my teeth.”

“If you come within two feet of this curtain, I will poke out your eyes while you sleep.”

“I won’t peek, Lou,” he chuckled.

I waited under the water with my arms wrapped tightly around my body. He spit, gurgled, and spit again, and then the door closed. I rinsed the soap from my skin, dried as quickly as possible, and then pulled my T-shirt and shorts on and slipping on my glasses.The night moisturizer harry had brought caught my eye, and I couldn’t help but smile. He was thoughtful and almost nice when he wanted to be.

Harry opened the door again. “C’mon, Bear! I’m gettin’ old, here!”

I threw my toothbrush at him and he ducked, shutting the door and laughing to himself all the way to his room. I brushed my teeth and then shuffled down the hall, passing Liam’s bedroom on the way.

“Night, Lou” Zayn called from the darkness.

“Night, Z.”

I hesitated before landing two soft knocks on Harry’s door.

“Come in, Lou. You don’t have to knock.”

He pulled the door open and I walked in, seeing his black iron-rod bed parallel to the line of windows on the far side of the room. The walls were bare except for a lone sombrero above his headboard. I half expected his room to be covered in posters of barely clothed women, but I didn’t even see an advertisement for a beer brand. His bed was black, his carpet gray; everything else in the room was white. It looked as if he’d just moved in.

“Nice PJs,” Harry said, noting my yellow-and-navy plaid shorts and gray Eastern T. He sat on his bed and patted the pillow beside him. “Well, come on. I’m not going to bite you.”

“I’m not afraid of you,” I said, walking over to the bed and dropping my Biology book beside him. “Do you have a pen?”

He nodded to his night table. “Top drawer.”

I reached across the bed and pulled open the drawer, finding three pens, a pencil, a tube of K-Y Jelly, and a clear, glass bowl overflowing with packages of different brands of condoms. Revolted, I grabbed a pen and shoved the drawer shut.

“What?” he asked, turning a page of my book.

“Did you rob the health clinic?”

“No. Why?”

I pulled the cap off the pen, unable to keep the sickened expression from my face. “Your lifetime supply of condoms.”

“Better safe than sorry, right?”

I rolled my eyes. Harry returned to the pages, a wry smile breaking across his lips. He read the notes to me, highlighting the main points while he asked me questions and patiently explained what I didn’t comprehend.

After an hour, I pulled off my glasses and rubbed my eyes. “I’m beat. I can’t memorize one more macromolecule.”

Harry smiled, closing my book. “All right.”

I paused, unsure of our sleeping arrangements. Harry left the room and walked down the hall, mumbling something into Liam’s room before turning on the shower. I turned back the covers and then pulled them up to my neck, listening to the high-pitched whine of the water running through the pipes.

Ten minutes later, the water shut off, and the floors creaked under Harry’s s steps. He strolled across the room with a towel wrapped around his hips. He had tattoos on opposite sides of his chest, and black tribal art covering each of his bulging shoulders. On his right arm, the black lines and symbols spanned from his shoulder to his wrist; on the left, the tattoos stopped at his elbow, with one single line of script on the underside of his forearm. I intentionally kept my back to him while he stood in front of his dresser and dropped his towel to slip on a pair of boxers.

After flipping off the light, he crawled into the bed beside me.

“You’re sleeping here, too?” I asked, turning to look at him. The full moon outside the windows cast shadows across his face. “Well, yeah. This is my bed.”

“I know, but I …” I paused. My only other options were the couch or the recliner.

Harry grinned and shook his head. “Don’t you trust me by now? I’ll be on my best behavior, I swear,” he said, holding up fingers that I was sure the Boy Scouts of America had never considered using.

I didn’t argue, I simply turned away and rested my head on the pillow, tucking the covers behind me to create a clear barrier between his body and mine.

“Goodnight, Bear,” he whispered into my ear. I could feel his minty breath on my cheek, giving rise to goose bumps on every inch of my flesh. Thank God it was dark enough that he couldn’t see my embarrassing reaction or the flush of my cheeks that followed.

· · ·

It seemed like I had just closed my eyes when I heard the alarm. I reached over to turn it off, but wrenched back my hand in horror when I felt warm skin beneath my fingers. I tried to recall where I was. When the answer hit, it mortified me that Harry might have thought I’d done it on purpose.

“Harry? Your alarm,” I whispered. He still didn’t move. “Harry!” I said, nudging him. When he still didn’t stir, I reached across him, fumbling in the dim light until I felt the top of the clock. Unsure of how to turn it off, I smacked the top of it until I hit the snooze button, and then fell against my pillow with a huff.

Harry chuckled.

“You were awake?”

“I promised I’d behave. I didn’t say anything about letting you lay on me.”

“I didn’t lay on you,” I protested. “I couldn’t reach the clock. That has to be the most annoying alarm I’ve ever heard. It sounds like a dying animal.”

He reached over and flipped a button. “You want breakfast?”

I glared at him, and then shook my head. “I’m not hungry.”

“Well, I am. Why don’t you ride with me down the street to the café?”

“I don’t think I can handle your lack of driving skills this early in the morning,” I said. I swung my feet over the side of the bed and shoved them into my slippers, shuffling to the door.

“Where are you going?” he asked.

“To get dressed and go to class. Do you need an itinerary while I’m here?”

Harry stretched, and then walked over to me, still in his boxers. “Are you always so temperamental, or will that taper off once you believe I’m not just creating some elaborate scheme to get in your pants?” His hands cupped my shoulders and I felt his thumbs caress my skin in unison.

“I’m not temperamental.”

He leaned in close and whispered in my ear. “I don’t want to sleep with you, Lou. I like you too much.”

He walked past me to the bathroom, and I stood, stunned. Stan’s words replayed in my mind. Harry Styles slept with every one; I couldn’t help but feel deficient in some way knowing he had no desire to even try to sleep with me.

The door opened again, and Zayn walked through. “Wakey, wakey, eggs ’n’ bakey!” He smiled, yawning.

“You’re turning into your mother, Z,” I grumbled, rifling through my suitcase.

“Oooh …did someone miss some sleep last night?”

“He barely breathed in my direction,” I said acerbically.

A knowing smile brightened Zayn’s face. “Oh.”

“Oh, what?”

“Nothing,” he said, returning to Liam’s room.

Harry was in the kitchen, humming a random tune while scrambling eggs. “You sure you don’t want some?” he asked.

“I’m sure. Thanks, though.”

Liam and Zayn walked in, and Liam pulled two plates from the cabinet, holding them out as Harry shoveled a pile of steaming eggs onto each one. Liam sat the plates on the bar, and he and Zayn sat together, satisfying the appetite they more than likely worked up the night before.

“Don’t look at me like that, Li. I’m sorry, I just don’t want to go,” Zayn said.

“Babe,the House has a date party twice a year,” liam spoke as he chewed. “It’s a month away”

“I would, Li …that’s really sweet …but I’m not gonna know anyone there.”

“A lot of the people that come don’t know a lot of people there,” he said, surprised at the rejection.

He slumped in her chair. “The sorority bitches get invited to those things. They’ll all know each other…it’ll be weird.”

“C’mon, Z. Don’t make me go alone.”

“Well…maybe you could find someone to take Louis? He said, looking at me, and then at Harry.

Harry raised an eyebrow, and Liam shook his head. “H doesn’t go to the date parties. It’s something you take your boyfriend or girlfriend… and Harry doesn’t … you know.”

Zayn shrugged. “We could set him up with someone.”

I narrowed my eyes at him”I can hear you, you know.”

Zayn used the face he knew I couldn’t say no to. “Please, Lou? We’ll find you a nice guy that’s funny and witty, and you know I’ll make sure he’s hot. I promise you’ll have a good time! And who knows? Maybe you’ll hit it off.”

Harry threw the pan in the sink. “I didn’t say I wouldn’t take him.”

I rolled my eyes. “Don’t do me any favors, Harry ”

“That’s not what I meant, Bear. Date parties are for the guys who are dating and it’s common knowledge that I don’t do that thing. But I won’t have to worry about you expecting an engagement ring afterward.”

Zayn jutted his lip out. “Pretty please, Lou?”

“Don’t look at me like that!” I complained. “Harry doesn’t want to go, I don’t want to go … we won’t be much fun.”

Harry crossed his arms and leaned against the sink. “I didn’t say I didn’t want to go. I think it’d be fun if the four of us went,” he shrugged.

Everyone’s eyes focused on me, and I recoiled. “Why don’t we hang out here?”

Zayn pouted and Liam leaned forward. “Because I have to go, Lou. I’m a freshman. I have to make sure everything’s moving smoothly, everyone has a beer in their hand, things like that.”

Harry walked across the kitchen and wrapped his arm around my shoulders, pulling me to his side. “C’mon, Bear. Will you go with me?”

I looked at Zayn, then at Liam, and finally to Harry. “Yes,” I sighed.

Zayn squealed and hugged me, and then I felt Liam’s hand on my back. “Thanks, Louis,” Liam said.


	3. Cheap Shot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I flipped around. “Oh my God! People probably think we’re together and you’re shamelessly continuing your … lifestyle. I must look pathetic!” I said, coming to the realization as I spoke. “I don’t think I should stay with you anymore. We should just stay away from each other in general for a while.”
> 
> I took my bag from him and he snatched it back.
> 
> “No one thinks we’re together, Lou. You don’t have to quit talking to me to prove a point.”

Niall took another drag. The smoke flowed from his nose in two thick streams. I angled my face toward the sun as he regaled me with the recent weekend of dancing, booze and a very persistent new friend.

“If he’s stalking you, then why do you let him buy you drinks?” I laughed.

“It’s simple, Louis. I’m broke.”

I laughed again, and Niall jabbed his elbow into my side when he caught sight of Harry walking toward us.

“Hey, Harry ,” Niall lilted, winking at me.

“Niall,” Harry said with a nod. He dangled his keys. “I’m headed home, Bear. You need a ride?”

“I was just going in,” I said, grinning up at him through my sunglasses.

“You’re not staying with me tonight?” he asked. His face was a combination of surprise and disappointment.

“No, I am. I just had to grab a few things that I forgot.”

“Like what?”

“Well, my razor for one. What do you care?”

“It’s about time you shaved your legs. They’ve been tearing the hell outta mine,” he said with an impish grin.

Niall eyes bulged as he gave me a quick once-over, and I made a face at Harry. “That’s how rumors get started!” I looked at Niall and shook my head. “I’m sleeping in his bed…just sleeping.”

“Right,” Niall said with a smug smile.

I smacked Niall’s arm before yanking the door open and climbing the stairs. By the time I reached the second floor, Harry was beside me.

“Oh, don’t be mad. I was just kidding.”

“Everyone already assumes we’re having sex. You’re making it worse.”

“Who cares what they think?”

“I do, harry! I do!” I pushed open my door, shoved random items in a small bag, and then stormed out with Harry trailing behind. He chuckled as he took the bag from my hand, and I glared at him. “It’s not funny. Do you want the whole school to think I’m one of your sluts?”

Harry frowned. “No one thinks that. And if they do, they better hope I don’t hear about it.”

He held the door open for me, and after walking through, I stopped abruptly in front of him.

‘Whoa!” he said, slamming into me.

I flipped around. “Oh my God! People probably think we’re together and you’re shamelessly continuing your … lifestyle. I must look pathetic!” I said, coming to the realization as I spoke. “I don’t think I should stay with you anymore. We should just stay away from each other in general for a while.”

I took my bag from him and he snatched it back.

“No one thinks we’re together, Lou. You don’t have to quit talking to me to prove a point.”

We engaged in a tug of war with the bag, and when he refused to let go, I growled loudly in frustration. “Have you ever had a boy that’s a friend—stay with you? Have you ever given boys or girls rides to and from school? Have you eaten lunch with them every day? No one knows what to think about us, even when we tell them!

He walked to the parking lot, holding my effects hostage. “I’ll fix this, okay? I don’t want anyone thinking less of you because of me,” he said with a troubled expression. His eyes brightened and he smiled. “Let me make it up to you. Why don’t we go to the Dutch tonight?”

“That’s a biker bar,” I sneered, watching him fasten my bag to his bike.

“Okay, then let’s go to the club. I’ll take you to dinner and then we can go to the Red Door. My treat.”

“How will going out to dinner and then to a club fix the problem? When people see us out together it will make it worse.”

He straddled his bike. “Think about it. Me, drunk, in a room full of scantily clad people? It won’t take long for people to figure out we’re not a couple.”

“So what am I supposed to do? Take a guy home from the bar to drive the point home?”

“I didn’t say that. No need to get carried away,” he said with a frown.

I rolled my eyes and climbed onto the seat, wrapping my arms around his middle. “Some random person is going to follow us home from the bar? That’s how you’re going to make it up to me?”

“You’re not jealous, are you, Lou?”

“Jealous of what? The STD-infested imbecile you’re going to piss off in the morning?”

Harry laughed, and then started his Harley. He flew toward his apartment at twice the speed limit, and I closed my eyes to block out the trees and cars we left behind.

After climbing off his bike, I smacked his shoulder. “Did you forget I was with you? Are you trying to get me killed?”

“It’s hard to forget you’re behind me when your thighs are squeezing the life out of me.” A smirk came with his next thought. “I couldn’t think of a better way to die, actually.”

“There is something very wrong with you.”

We had barely made it inside when Zayn shuffled out of Liam’s bedroom. “We were thinking about going out tonight. You guys in?”

I looked at Harry and grinned. “We’re going to swing by the sushi place before we go to Red.”

Zayn’s smile spanned from one side of his face to the other. “Li!” He cried, scampering into the bathroom. “We’re going out tonight!”

I was the last one in the shower, so Liam Zayn and Harry were impatiently standing by the door when I stepped out of the bathroom in my black skinny jeans (that according to Zayn made my ass look bigger ) a white shirt and Zayn had styled my hair 

Zayn whistled. “Hot damn, Lou!”

I smiled in appreciation as Harry came closer. “Look at you.. you look so hot” 

“Did I mention that Zayn styled my hair?”

“I don’t think it’s the hair,” he smiled, pulling me out the door.

We were far too loud and obnoxious in the sushi bar, and had already had a night’s worth to drink before we stepped foot in the Red Door. Liam pulled into the parking lot, taking time to find a space.

“Sometime tonight, Li ,” Zayn muttered.

“Hey. I have to find a wide space. I don’t want some drunken idiot dinging the paint.”

Once we parked, Harry leaned the seat forward and helped me out. “I meant to ask you about your IDs. They’re flawless. You didn’t get them around here.”

“Yeah, we’ve had them for a while. It was necessary … in Wichita,” I said.

“Necessary?” Harry asked.

“It’s a good thing you have connections,” Zayn said. He hiccuped and covered his mouth, giggling.

“Dear God, Z,” Liam said, holding Zayn’s arm as he awkwardly stepped along the gravel. “I think you’re already done for the night.”

Harry made a face. “What are you talking about, Z? What connections?”

“Lou has some old friends that—”

“They’re fake IDs H,” I interrupted. “You have to know the right people if you want them done right, right?”

Zayn purposefully looked away from Harry, and I waited.

“Right,” he said, extending his hand for mine.

I grabbed three of his fingers and smiled, knowing by his expression that he wasn’t satisfied with my answer.

“I need another drink!” I said as a second attempt to change the subject.

“Shots!” Zayn yelled.

Liam rolled his eyes. “Oh, yeah. That’s what you need, another shot.”

Once inside, Zayn immediately pulled me onto the dance floor. His hair was everywhere, and I laughed at the face he made when he moved to music. When the song was over, we joined the boys at the bar. An excessively voluptuous platinum blonde was already at Harry’s side, and Zayn’s face screwed into revulsion.

“It’s going to be like this all night, Z. Just ignore them,” Liam said, nodding to a small group of girls standing a few feet away. They eyed the blonde, waiting for their turn.

“It looks like Vegas threw up on a flock of vultures,” Zayn sneered.

Harry lit a cigarette as he ordered two more beers, and the blonde bit her puffy, glossed lip and smiled. The bartender popped the tops open and slid the bottles to Harry. The blonde picked up one of the beers, but Harry pulled it from her hand.

“Uh…not yours,” he said to her, handing it to me.

My initial thought was to toss the bottle in the trash, but the woman looked so offended, I smiled and took a drink. She walked off in a huff, and I chuckled that Harry didn’t seem to notice.

“Like I would buy a beer for someone at a bar,” he said, shaking his head. I held up my beer, and he pulled up one side of his mouth into a half smile. “You’re different.”

I clinked my bottle against his. “To being the only boy a guy with no standards doesn’t want to sleep with.” I said, taking a swig.

“Are you serious?” he asked, pulling the bottle from my mouth. When I didn’t recant, he leaned toward me. “First of all … I have standards. I’ve never been with an ugly person. Ever. Second of all, I wanted to sleep with you. I thought about throwing you over my couch fifty different ways, but I haven’t because I don’t see you that way anymore. It’s not that I’m not attracted to you, I just think you’re better than that.”

I couldn’t hold back the smug smile that crept across my face. “You think I’m too good for you.”

He sneered at my second insult. “I can’t think of a single guy I know that’s good enough for you.”

The smugness melted away, replaced with a touched, appreciative smile. “Thanks, H ,” I said, setting my empty bottle on the bar.

Harry pulled on my hand. “C’mon,” he said, tugging me through the crowd to the dance floor.

“I’ve had a lot to drink! I’m going to fall!”

Harry-smiled and pulled me to him, grabbing my hips. “Shut up and dance.”

Zayn and liam appeared beside us. Liam moved like he’d been watching too many Usher videos. Harry had me near panic with the way he pressed against me. If he used any of those moves on the couch, I could see why so many girls chanced humiliation in the morning.

He cinched his hands around my hips, and I noticed that his expression was different, almost serious. I ran my hands over his flawless chest and six-pack as they stretched and tensed under his tight shirt to the music. I turned my back to him, smiling when he wrapped his arms around my waist. Coupled with the alcohol in my system, when he pulled my body against his, things came to mind that were anything but friendly.

The next song bled into the one we were dancing to, and Harry showed no signs of wanting to return to the bar. The sweat beaded on the back of my neck, and the multicolored strobe lights made me feel a bit dizzy. I closed my eyes and leaned my head against his shoulder. He grabbed my hands and pulled them up and around his neck. His hands ran down my arms and down my ribs, finally returning to my hips. When I felt his lips and then his tongue against my neck, I pulled away from him.

He chuckled, looking a bit surprised. “What, Lou?”

My temper flared, making the sharp words I wanted to say stick in my throat. I retreated to the bar and ordered another Corona. Harry took the stool beside me, holding up his finger to order one for himself. As soon as the bartender set the bottle in front of me, I tipped it up and drank half the contents before slamming it to the bar.

“You think that is going to change anyone’s mind about us?” I said, fixing my hair and shirt trying to cover the spot he kissed

He laughed once. “I don’t give a damn what they think about us.”

I shot him a dirty look and then turned to face forward.

“Bear,” he said, touching my arm.

I pulled away from him. “Don’t. I could never get drunk enough to let you get me on that couch.”

His face twisted in anger, but before he could say anything, a dark-haired stunner with pouty lips, enormous blue eyes, and far too much cleavage approached him.

“Well. If it isn’t Harry Styles,” she said, bouncing in all the right places.

He took a drink, and then his eyes locked on mine. “Hey, Megan.”

“Introduce me to your boyfriend” she smiled. I rolled my eyes.

Harry tipped his head back to finish his beer, and then slid his empty bottle down the bar. Everyone waiting to order watched it until it fell into the trash can at the end. “He’s not my boyfriend.”

He grabbed Megan’s hand, and she happily traipsed behind him to the dance floor. He all but mauled her for one song, and then another, and another. They were causing a scene with the way she let him grope her, and when he bent her over I turned my back to them.

“You look pissed,” a man said as he sat next to me. “Is that your boyfriend out there?”

“No, he’s just a friend,” I grumbled.

“Well, that’s good. That could have been pretty awkward for you if he was.” He faced the dance floor, shaking his head at the spectacle.

“Tell me about it,” I said, drinking the last of my beer. I barely tasted the last two I had put away, and my teeth were numb.

“Would you like another one?” he asked. I looked over at him and he smiled. “I’m Ethan.”

“Louis,” I said, taking his outstretched hand.

He held up two fingers to the bartender, and I smiled. “Thanks.”

“So you live here?” he asked.

“In Morgan Hall at Eastern.”

“I have an apartment in Hinley.”

“You go to State?” I asked. “What is that … like an hour away? What are you doing over here?”

“I graduated last May. My little sister goes to Eastern. I’m staying with her this week while I apply for jobs.”

“Uh-oh … living in the real world, huh?”

Ethan laughed. “And it’s everything they say it is.”

I smiled, feeling the anger at Travis and the heaviness of the alcohol.

Ethan’s eyes brightened as I leaned in closer, and I smiled when he touched my knee. He pulled back his hand when Harry stepped between us.

“You ready, Bear?”

“I’m talking, Harry,” I said, moving him back. His shirt was damp from the circus on the dance floor, and I made a show of wiping my hand on my skirt.

Harry made a face. “Do you even know this guy?”

“This is Ethan,” I said, sending my new friend the best flirty smile I could manage.

He winked at me, and then looked at Harry extending his hand. “Nice to meet you.”

Harry watched me expectantly until I finally gave in, waving my hand in his general direction. “Ethan, this is Harry,” I muttered.

“Harry styles,” he said, staring at Ethan’s hand as if he wanted to rip it off.

Ethan’s eyes grew wide and he awkwardly pulled back his hand. “Harry styles? Eastern’s harry styles?”

I rested my cheek on my fist, dreading the inevitable testosterone-fueled story swapping that would soon ensue.

Harry stretched his arm behind me to grip the bar. “Yeah, what of it?”

“I saw you fight Shawn Smith last year, man. I thought I was about to witness someone’s death!”

Harry glowered down at him. “You wanna see it again?”

Ethan laughed once, his eyes darting back and forth between us. When he realized Harry was serious, he smiled at me apologetically and left.

“Are you ready, now?” he snapped.

“You are a complete asshole, you know that?”

“I’ve been called worse,” he said, helping me off the stool.

We followed Zayn and Liam to the car, and when Harry tried to grab my hand to lead me across the parking lot, I yanked it away. He wheeled around and I jerked to a stop, leaning back when he came within a few inches of my face.

“I should just kiss you and get it over with!” he yelled. “You’re being ridiculous! I kissed your neck, so what?”

I could smell the beer and cigarettes on his breath and I pushed him away. “I’m not your fuck buddy, Harry.”

He shook his head in disbelief. “I never said you were! You’re around me 24-7, you sleep in my bed, but half the time you act like you don’t wanna be seen with me!”

“I came here with you!”

“I have never treated you with anything but respect, Louis.”

I stood my ground. “No, you just treat me like your property. You had no right to run Ethan off like that!”

“Do you know who Ethan is?” he asked. When I shook my head, he leaned in closer. “I do. He was arrested last year for sexual battery, but the charges were dropped.”

I crossed my arms. “Oh, so you have something in common?”

Harry eyes narrowed, and the muscles in his jaws twitched under his skin. “Are you calling me a rapist?” he said in a cold, low tone.

I pressed my lips together, even angrier that he was right. I had taken it too far. “No, I’m just pissed at you!”

“I’ve been drinking, all right? Your skin was three inches from my face, and you’re beautiful, and you smell fucking awesome when you sweat. I kissed you! I’m sorry! Get over yourself!”

His excuse made the corners of my mouth turn up. “You think I’m beautiful?”

He frowned with disgust. “You’re gorgeous and you know it. What are you smiling about?”

I tried to quell my amusement to no avail. “Nothing. Let’s go.”

Harry laughed once and shook his head. “Wha …? You …? You’re a pain in my ass!” he yelled, glaring at me. I couldn’t stop smiling, and after a few seconds, Harry’s mouth turned up. He shook his head again, and then hooked his arm around my neck. “You’re making me crazy. You know that, right?”

At the apartment, we all stumbled through the door. I made a beeline for the bathroom to wash the smoke out of my hair. When I stepped out of the shower, I saw that Harry had brought me one of his T-shirts and a pair of his boxers to change into.

The shirt swallowed me, and the boxers disappeared under the shirt. I crashed into the bed and sighed, still smiling at what he’d said in the parking lot.

Harry stared at me for a moment, and I felt a twinge in my chest. I had an almost ravenous urge to grab his face and plant my mouth on his, but I fought against the alcohol and hormones raging through my bloodstream.

“Night, Bear,” he whispered, turning over.

I fidgeted, not yet ready to sleep. “H?” I said, leaning up to rest my chin on his shoulder.

“Yeah?”

“I know I’m drunk, and we just got into a ginormous fight over this, but …”

“I’m not having sex with you, so quit asking,” he said, his back still turned to me.

“What? No!” I cried.

Harry laughed and turned, looking at me with a soft expression. “What, Lou?”

  
I sighed. “This,” I said, laying my head on his chest and stretching my arm across his middle, snuggling as close to him as I could.

He stiffened and held his hands up, as if he didn’t know how to react. “You are drunk.”

“I know,” I said, too intoxicated to be embarrassed.

He relaxed one hand against my back, and the other on my wet hair, and then pressed his lips to my forehead. “You are the most confusing boy I’ve ever met.”

“It’s the least you can do after scaring off the only guy that approached me tonight.”

“You mean Ethan the rapist? Yeah, I owe you for that one.”

“Never mind,” I said, feeling the beginning of a rejection coming on.

He grabbed my arm and held it on his stomach to keep me from pulling away. “No, I’m serious. You need to be more careful. If I wasn’t there … I don’t even want to think about it. And now you expect me to apologize for running him off?”

“I don’t want you to apologize. It’s not even about that.”

“Then what’s it about?” he asked, searching my eyes for something. His face was just a few inches from mine, and I could feel his breath on my lips.

I frowned. “I’m drunk, Harry. It’s the only excuse I have.”

“You just want me to hold you until you fall asleep?”

I didn’t answer.

He shifted to look straight into my eyes. “I should say no to prove a point,” he said, his eyebrows pulling together. “But I would hate myself later if I said no and you never asked me again.”

I nestled my cheek against his chest, and he tightened his arms, sighing. “You don’t need an excuse, Babe. All you have to do is ask.”

· · ·

I cringed at the sunlight pouring through the window and the alarm blaring into my ear. Harry was still asleep, surrounding me with both his arms and his legs. I maneuvered an arm free to reach over and pound the snooze button. Wiping my face, I looked over at him, sleeping soundly two inches from my face.

“Oh my God,” I whispered, wondering how we’d managed to become so tangled. I took a deep breath and held it as I worked to free myself from his grip.  
“Stop it, Lou, I’m sleepin’,” he mumbled, squeezing me against him.

After several attempts, I finally slid from his grip and sat on the edge of the bed, looking back at his half-naked body draped in covers. I watched him for a moment and sighed. The lines were becoming blurred, and it was my fault.

His hand slid across the sheets and he touched my fingers. “What’s wrong, Bear?” he said, his eyes barely open.

“I’m going to get a glass of water, you want anything?” Harry shook his head and closed his eyes, his cheek flat against the mattress.

“Morning, Lou,” liam said from the recliner when I rounded the corner.

“Where’s Z?”

“Still sleeping. What are you doing up so early?” he asked, looking at the clock.

“The alarm went off, but I always wake up early after I drink. It’s a curse.”

“Me, too,” he nodded.

“You better get Z up. We have class in an hour,” I said, turning on the tap, and leaning over to take a sip.

Liam nodded. “I was just going to let him sleep.”

“Don’t do that. He’ll be mad if he misses.”

“Oh,” he said, standing up. “Better wake her, then.” He wheeled around. “Hey, Lou?”

“Yeah?”

“I don’t know what’s going on with you and Harry but I know that he’s going to do something stupid to piss you off. It’s a tic he has. He doesn’t get close with anyone very often, and for whatever reason he’s let you in. But you have to overlook his demons. It’s the only way he’ll know.”

“Know what?” I asked, raising an eyebrow at his melodramatic speech.

“If you’ll climb over the wall,” he answered simply.

I shook my head and chuckled. “Whatever you say, Li.”

Liam shrugged, and then disappeared into his bedroom. I heard soft murmurs, a protesting groan, and then Zayn sweet giggling.

I swirled the oatmeal around in my bowl, and squeezed the chocolate syrup in as I stirred.

“That’s sick, Lou,” Travis said, wearing only a pair of green plaid boxers. He rubbed his eyes and pulled a box of cereal from the cabinet.

“Good morning to you, too,” I said, snapping the cap on the bottle.

“I hear your birthday is coming up. Last stand of your teenage years,” he grinned, his eyes puffy and red.

“Yeah … I’m not a big birthday person. I think Z is going to take me to dinner or something.” I smiled, “You can come if you want.”

“All right,” he shrugged. “It’s a week from Sunday?”

“Yes. When’s your birthday?”

He poured the milk, dunking the flakes with his spoon, “Not ’til April. April first.”

“Shut up.”

“No, I’m serious.” he said, chewing.

“Your birthday is on April Fools’?” I asked again, raising an eyebrow.

He laughed. “Yes! You’re gonna be late. I better get dressed.”

“I’m riding with Z.”

I could tell he was being intentionally cool when he shrugged. “Whatever,” he said, turning his back to me to finish his cereal.


	4. THE BET

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Sorry for the late update, the story didn’t get the attention i honestly thought it would get so that just made me stop updating. Anyway, I promise I’ll upload all the chapters for the few of you that left a comment
> 
> Stay healthy and stay home! x

Chapter Four

“He’s definitely staring at you,” Zayn whispered, leaning back to peek across the room.

“Stop looking, twat, he’s going to see you.”

Zayn smiled and waved. “He’s already seen me. He’s still staring.”

I hesitated for a moment and then finally worked up enough courage to look in his direction. Nick was looking right at me, grinning.

I returned his smile and then pretended to type something on my laptop.

“Is he still staring?” I murmured.

“Yep,” he giggled.

After class, Nick stopped me in the hall.

“Don’t forget about the party this weekend.”

“I won’t,” I said, trying not to bat my eyes or do anything else ridiculous.

Zayn and I made our way across the lawn to the cafeteria to meet Harry and Liam for lunch. He was still laughing about Nicks behavior when Liam and harry approached.

“Hey, baby,” Zayn said, kissing his boyfriend square on the mouth.

“What’s so funny?” Liam asked.

“Oh, a guy in class was staring at Louis all hour. It was adorable.”

“As long as he was staring at Louis” liam winked.

“Who was it?” Harry grimaced.

I readjusted my backpack, prompting Harry to slide it off my arms and hold it. I shook my head. “Zayn imagining things.”

“Louis! You big fat liar! It was Nick Grimshaw and he was being so obvious. The guy was practically drooling.”

Harry expression twisted into disgust. “Nick Grimshaw ?”

Liam pulled on Zayn’s hand. “We’re headed to lunch. Will you be enjoying the fine cafeteria cuisine this afternoon?”

Zayn kissed him again in answer, and Harry and I followed behind. I sat my tray between Zayn and Niall but Harry didn’t sit in his normal seat across from me. Instead, he sat a few seats down. It was then that I realized he hadn’t said much during our walk to the cafeteria.

“Are you okay, H?” I asked.

“Me? Fine, why?” he said, smoothing the features of his face.

“You’ve just been quiet.”

Several members of the football team approached the table and sat down, laughing loudly. Harry looked a bit annoyed as he rolled his food around on his plate.

Chris Jenks tossed a french fry onto Harry’s plate. “What’s up, H? I heard you fucked Tina Martin. She’s been raking your name through the mud today.”

“Shut up, Jenks,” Harry said, keeping his eyes on his food.

I leaned forward so the brawny giant sitting in front of Harry could experience the full force of my glare. “Knock it off, Chris.”

Harry’s eyes bored into mine. “I can take care of myself, Lou.”

“I’m sorry, I …”

“I don’t want you to be sorry. I don’t want you to be anything,” he snapped, shoving away from the table and storming out the door.

Niall looked over at me with raised eyebrows. “Whoa. What was that about?”

I stabbed a Tater Tot with my fork and puffed. “I don’t know.”

Liam patted my back. “It’s nothing you did, Lou.”

“He just has stuff going on,” Zayn added.

“What kind of stuff?” I asked.

Liam shrugged and turned his attention to his plate. “You should know by now that it takes patience and a forgiving attitude to be friends with Harry. He’s his own universe.”

I shook my head. “That’s the Harry everyone else sees … not the Harry I know.”

Liam leaned forward. “There’s no difference. You just have to ride the wave.”

After class, I rode with Zayn to the apartment to find Harry’s motorcycle gone. I went into his room and curled into a ball on his bed, resting my head on my arm. Harry had been fine that morning. As much time as we had spent together, I couldn’t believe I didn’t see that something had been bothering him. Not only that, it disturbed me that Zayn seemed to know what was going on and I didn’t.

My breathing evened out and my eyes grew heavy; it wasn’t long before I fell asleep. When my eyes opened again, the night sky had darkened the window. Muffled voices filtered down the hall from the living room, including Harry’s deep tone. I crept down the hall, and then froze when I heard my name.

“Lou gets it, H. Don’t beat yourself up,” Liam said.

“You’re already going to the date party. What’s the harm in asking him out?” Zayn asked.

I stiffened, waiting for his response. “I don’t want to date him; I just want to be around him. He’s … different.”

“Different how?” Zayn asked, sounding irritated.

He doesn’t put up with my bullshit, it’s refreshing. You said it yourself, Z. I’m not his type. It’s just not … like that with us.”

“You’re closer to his type than you know,” Zayn said.

I backed up as quietly as I could, and when the wooden boards creaked beneath my bare feet, I reached over to pull Harry’s bedroom door shut, and then walked down the hall.

“Hey, Lou,” Zayn said with a grin. “How was your nap?”

“I was out for five hours. That’s closer to a coma than a nap.”

Harry stared at me for a moment, and when I smiled at him, he walked straight toward me, grabbed my hand, and pulled me down the hall to his bedroom. He shut the door, and I felt my heart pounding in my chest, bracing for him to say something else to crush my ego.

His eyebrows pulled in. “I’m so sorry, Bear. I was an asshole to you earlier.”

I relaxed a bit, seeing the remorse in his eyes. “I didn’t know you were mad at me.”

“I wasn’t mad at you. I just have a bad habit of lashing out at those I care about. It’s a piss-poor excuse, I know, but I am sorry,” he said, enveloping me in his arms.

I nestled my cheek against his chest, settling in. “What were you mad about?”

“It’s not important. The only thing I’m worried about is you.”

I leaned back to look up at him. “I can handle your temper tantrums.”

His eyes scanned my face for several moments before a small smile spread across his lips. “I don’t know why you put up with me, and I don’t know what I’d do if you didn’t.”

I could smell the mixture of cigarettes and mint on his breath, and I looked at his lips, my body reacting to how close we were. Harry’s expression changed and his breathing staggered—he had noticed, too.

He leaned in infinitesimally, and then we both jumped when his cell phone rang. He sighed, pulling it from his pocket.

“Yeah. Hoffman? Jesus … all right. That’ll be an easy grand. Jefferson?” He looked at me and winked. “We’ll be there.” He hung up and took my hand. “Come with me.” He pulled me down the hall. “That was Adam,” he said to Liam. “Brady Hoffman will be at Jefferson in ninety minutes.”

Iiam nodded and stood up, digging his cell phone from his pocket. He quickly tapped in the information, sending exclusive text invitations to those who knew about the Circle. Those ten or so members would text ten members on their list, and so on, until the every member knew exactly where the floating fight ring would be held.

“Here we go,” Zayn said, smiling. “We’d better freshen up!”

The air in the apartment was tense and buoyant at the same time. Harry seemed the least affected, slipping on his boots and a white tank top as if he were leaving to run an errand.

Zayn led me down the hall to Harry’s bedroom and frowned. “You have to change, Lou. You can’t wear that to the fight.”

“I wore a freaking cardigan last time and you didn’t say anything!” I protested.

“I didn’t think you’d go last time. Here,” he threw clothes at me, “put this on.”

“I am not wearing this!”

“Let’s go!” Liam called from the living room.

“Hurry up!” Zayn snapped, running into Liam’s room.

I pulled on the deep-cut yellow shirt and tight black jeans Zayn had thrown at me, and then slipped on a pair of adidas sneakers. Zayn came out of his room with a green shirt that matched his eyes, when we rounded the corner, harry and Liam were standing at the door.

Harry’s mouth fell open. “Oh, hell no. Are you trying to get me killed? You’ve gotta change, bear.”

“What?” I asked, looking down.

Zayn looked at me “he looks hot, H, leave him alone!”

Harry took my hand and led me down the hall. “Get a loose T-shirt on … and some joggers.. Something comfortable.”

“What? Why?”

“Because I’ll be more worried about who’s looking at your ass instead of Hoffman,” he said, stopping at his door.

“I thought you said you didn’t give a damn what anyone else thought?”

“That’s a different scenario, Love” Harry looked up and down at me. “You can’t wear this to the fight, so please … just … please just change,” he stuttered, shoving me into the room and shutting me in.

“Harry!” I yelled. I kicked off my jeans and put on some loose adidas joggers. throwing my black jeans across the room. The first sweatshirt that touched my hands I yanked over my head, and then ran down the hall, standing in the doorway.

“Better?” I huffed

“Yes!” Harry said, relieved. “Let’s go!”

We raced to the parking lot. I jumped on the back of Harry’s motorcycle as he ripped the engine and peeled out, flying down the road to the college. I squeezed his middle in anticipation; the rushing to get out the door sent adrenaline surging through my veins.

Harry drove over the curb, parking his motorcycle in the shadows behind the Jefferson Liberal Arts building. He pushed his sunglasses to the top of his head and then grabbed my hand, smiling as we snuck to the back of the building. He stopped at an open window near the ground.

My eyes widened with realization. “You’re joking.”

Harry smiled. “This is the VIP entrance. You should see how everyone else gets in.”

I shook my head as he worked his legs through, and then disappeared. I leaned down and called into oblivion, “Harry!”

“Down here, Bear. Just come in feet first, I’ll catch you.”

“You’re out of your damn mind if you think I’m jumping into the dark!”

“I’ll catch you! I promise! Now get your ass in here!”

I sighed, touching my forehead with my hand. “This is insane!”

I sat down, and then scooted forward until half of my body was dangling in the dark. I turned onto my stomach and pointed my toes, feeling for the floor. I waited for my feet to touch Harry’s hand, but I lost my grip, squealing when I fell backward. A pair of hands grabbed me, and I heard Harry’s voice in the darkness.

“You fall like a toddler,” he chuckled.

He lowered my feet to the ground and then pulled me deeper into the blackness. After a dozen steps, I could hear the familiar yelling of numbers and names, and then the room was illuminated. A lantern sat in the corner, lighting the room just enough that I could make out Harry’s face.

“What are we doing?”

“Waiting. Adam has to run through his spiel before I go in.”

I fidgeted. “Should I wait here, or should I go in? Where do I go when the fight starts? Where’s Li and Zayn?”

“They went in the other way. Just follow me out, I’m not sending you into that shark pit without me. Stay by Adam; he’ll keep you from getting crushed. I can’t look out for you and throw punches at the same time.”

“Crushed?”

“There’s going to be more people here tonight. Brady Hoffman is from State. They have their own Circle there. It will be our crowd and their crowd, so the room’s gonna get crazy.”

“Are you nervous?” I asked.

He smiled, looking down at me. “No. You look a little nervous, though.”

“Maybe,” I admitted.

“If it’ll make you feel better, I won’t let him touch me. I won’t even let him get one in for his fans.”

“How are you going to manage that?”

He shrugged. “I usually let them get one in—to make it look fair.”

“You …? You let people hit you?”

“How much fun would it be if I just massacred someone and they never got a punch in? It’s not good for business, no one would bet against me.”

“What a load of crap,” I said, crossing my arms.

Harry raised an eyebrow. “You think I’m yankin’ your chain?”

“I find it hard to believe that you only get hit when you let them hit you.”

“Would you like to make a wager on that, Louis tomlinson?” he smiled, his eyes animated.

I smiled. “I’ll take that bet. I think he’ll get one in on you.”

“And if he doesn’t? What do I win?” he asked. I shrugged as the yelling on the other side of the wall grew to a roar. Adam greeted the crowd, and then went over the rules.

Harry’s mouth stretched into a wide grin. “If you win, I’ll go without sex for a month.” I raised an eyebrow and he smiled again. “But if I win, you have to stay with me for a month.”

“What? I’m staying with you, anyway! What kind of bet is that?” I shrieked over the noise.

“They fixed the boilers at Morgan today,” Harry said with a smile and a wink.

A smirk softened my expression as Adam called Harry name. “Anything is worth watching you try abstinence for a change.”

Harry kissed my cheek, and then walked out, standing tall. I followed behind, and when we crossed into the next room, I was startled by the number of people packed together in the small space. It was standing room only, but the shoving and shouting only amplified once we entered the room. Harry nodded in my direction, and then Adam’s hand was on my shoulders, pulling me to his side.

I leaned into Adam’s ear. “I’ve got two on Harry,” I said.

Adam’s eyebrows shot up as he watched me pull two Benjamins from my pocket. He held out his palm, and I slapped the bills into his hand.

“You’re not the Goody Two-shoes I thought you were,” he said, giving me a once-over.

Brady was at least a head taller than Harry and I gulped when I saw them stand toe to toe. Brady was massive, twice Harry’s size and solid muscle. I couldn’t see Harry’s expression, but it was obvious that Brady was out for blood.

Adam pressed his lips against my ear. “You might want to plug your ears, kiddo.”

I cupped my hands on each side of my head, and Adam sounded the horn. Instead of attacking, Harry took a few steps back. Brady swung, and Harry dodged to the right. Brady swung again, and Harry ducked and sidestepped to the other side.

What the hell? This ain’t a boxing match, Harry!” Adam yelled.

Harry landed a punch to Brady’s nose. The volume in the basement was deafening then. Harry sank a left hook into Brady’s jaw, and my hands flew over my mouth when Brady attempted a few more punches, each one catching air. Brady fell against his entourage when Harry elbowed him in the face. Just when I thought it was almost over, Brady came out swinging again. Throw after throw, Brady couldn’t seem to keep up. Both men were covered in sweat, and I gasped when Brady missed another punch, slamming his hand into a cement pillar. When he folded over, cradling his fist beneath him, Harry went in for the kill.

He was relentless, first bringing his knee to Brady’s face and then pummeling him over and over until Brady stumbled and hit the ground. The noise level boomed as Adam left my side to throw the red square on Brady’s bloodied face.

Harry disappeared behind his fans, and I pressed my back against the wall, feeling my way to the doorway we came in. Reaching the lantern was a huge relief. I worried about being knocked down and trampled.

My eyes focused on doorway, waiting for the crowd to spill into the small room. After several minutes and no sign of Harry. I prepared to retrace my steps to the window. With the number of people trying to leave at once, it wasn’t safe enough to chance wandering around.

Just as I stepped into the darkness, footsteps crunched against the loose concrete on the floor. Harry was looking for me in a panic.

“Louis!”

“I’m here!” I called out, running into his arms.

Harry looked down and frowned. “You scared the shit out of me! I almost had to start another fight just to get to you … I finally get here and you’re gone!”

“I’m glad you’re back. I wasn’t looking forward to trying to find my way in the dark.”

All worry left his face, and he smiled widely. “I believe you lost the bet.”

Adam stomped in, looked at me, and then glowered at Harry. “We need to talk.”

Harry winked at me. “Stay put. I’ll be right back.”

They disappeared into the darkness. Adam raised his voice a few times, but I couldn’t make out what he was saying. Harrh returned, shoving a wad of cash into his pocket, and then he offered a half smile. “You’re going to need more clothes.”

“You’re really going to make me stay with you for a month?”

“Would you have made me go without sex for a month?”

I laughed, knowing I would. “We better stop at Morgan.”

Harry beamed. “This should be interesting.”

As Adam passed, he slammed my winnings into my palm, and then merged into the dissipating mob.

Harry raised an eyebrow. “You put in?”

I smiled and shrugged. “I thought I should get the full experience.”

He led me to the window and then crawled out, turning to help me up and out to the fresh night air. The crickets were chirping in the shadows, stopping just long enough to let us pass. The monkey grass that lined the sidewalk weaved in the gentle breeze, reminding me of the sound the ocean makes when I wasn’t quite close enough to hear the waves breaking. It wasn’t too hot or too cold; it was the perfect night.

“Why on earth would you want me to stay with you, anyway?” I asked.

Harry shrugged, shoving his hands in his pockets. “I don’t know. Everything’s better when you’re around.”

The warm and fuzzies I felt from his words quickly faded with the sight of the red, blotchy mess on his shirt. “Ew. You have blood all over you.”

Harry looked down with indifference and then opened the door, gesturing for me to walk in. I breezed by Stan, who studied on his bed, held captive by the textbooks that surrounded him.

“The boilers were fixed this morning,” he said.

“I heard,” I said, rifling through my closet.

“Hi,” Harry said to Stan.

Stan’s face twisted as he scanned Harry’s sweaty, bloody form.

“Harry this is my roommate, Stan Lin. Stan, Harry Styles.”

“Nice to meet you,” Stan said, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose. He glanced at my bulging bags. “Are you moving out?”

“Nope. Lost a bet.”

Harry burst into laughter, grabbing my bags. “Ready?”

“Yeah. How am I going to get all of this to your apartment? We’re on your bike.”

Harry smiled and pulled out his cell phone. He carried my luggage to the street, and minutes later, Liam’s black vintage Charger pulled up.

The passenger-side window rolled down, and Zayn poked his head out. “Hey, Babe”

“Hey yourself. The boilers are working again at Morgan. Are you still staying with Li?”

He winked. “Yeah, I thought I’d stay tonight. I heard you lost a bet.”

Before I could speak, Harry shut the trunk and Liam sped off, with Zayn squealing as he fell back into the car.

We walked to his Harley, and he waited for me to settle into my seat. When I wrapped my arms around him, he rested his hand on mine.

“I’m glad you were there tonight, Bear. I’ve never had so much fun at a fight in my life.”

I perched my chin on his shoulder and smiled. “That was because you were trying to win our bet.”

He angled his neck to face me. “Damn right I was.” There was no amusement in his eyes, he was serious, and he wanted me to see it.

My eyebrows shot up. “Is that why you were in such a bad mood today? Because you knew they’d fixed the boilers, and I would be leaving tonight?”

Harry didn’t answer; he only smiled as he started his motorcycle. The drive to the apartment was uncharacteristically slow. At every stoplight, Harry would either cover my hands with his, or he would rest his hand on my knee. The lines were blurring again, and I wondered how we would spend a month together and not ruin everything. The loose ends of our friendship were tangling in a way I never imagined.

When we arrived in the apartment parking lot, Liam’s Charger sat in its usual spot.

I stood in front of the steps. “I always hate it when they’ve been home for a while. I feel like we’re going to interrupt them.”

“Get used to it. This is your place for the next four weeks,” Harry smiled and turned his back to me. “Get on.”

“What?” I smiled.

“C’mon, I’ll carry you up.”

I giggled and hopped onto his back, interlacing my fingers on his chest as he ran up the stairs. Zayn opened the door before we made it to the top and smiled.

“Look at you two. If I didn’t know better …”

“Knock it off, Z,” Liam said from the couch.

Zayn smiled as if he’d said too much, and then opened the door wide so we could both fit through. Harry collapsed against the recliner. I squealed when he leaned against me.

“You’re awfully cheerful this evening, H. What gives?” Zayn prompted.

I leaned over to see his face. I’d never seen him so pleased.

“I just won a shitload of money, Z. Twice as much as I thought I would. What’s not to be happy about?”

Zayn grinned. “No, it’s something else,” he said, watching Harrys hand as he patted my thigh. He was right; he was different. There was an air of peace around him, almost as if some kind of new contentment had settled into his soul.

“Z.. babe,” Shepley warned.

“Fine, I’ll talk about something else. Didn’t Nick invite you to the Sig Tau party this weekend, Lou?”

Harry’s smile vanished and he turned to me, waiting for an answer.

“Er … yeah? Aren’t we all going?”

“I’ll be there,” Liam said, distracted by the television.

“And that means I’m going,” Z said, looking expectantly at Harry.

Harry watched me for a moment, and then nudged my leg. “Is he picking you up or something?”

“No, he just told me about the party.”

Zayn mouth spread into a mischievous grin, almost bobbing in anticipation. “He said he’d see you there, though. He’s really cute.”

Harry shot an irritated glance in Zayn’s direction and then looked to me. “Are you going?”

“I told him I would,” I shrugged. “Are you going?”

“Yeah,” he said without hesitation.

Liam’s attention turned to Harry, then. “You said last week you weren’t.”

“I changed my mind, Li. What’s the problem?”

“Nothing,” he grumbled, retreating to his bedroom.

Zayn frowned at Harry. “You know what the problem is,” he said. “Why don’t you quit driving him crazy and just get it over with.” He joined Liam in his room, and their voices were reduced to murmuring behind the closed door.

“Well, I’m glad everyone else knows,” I said.

Harry stood up. “I’m going to take a quick shower.”

“Is there something going on with them?” I asked.

“No, he’s just paranoid.”

“It’s because of us,” I guessed. Harry’s eyes lit up and he nodded.

“What?” I asked, eyeing him suspiciously.

“You’re right. It’s because of us. Don’t fall asleep, okay? I wanna talk to you about something.”

He walked backward a few steps, and then disappeared behind the bathroom door. I twisted my hair around my finger, mulling over the way he emphasized the word us, and the look on his face when he’d said it. I wondered if there had ever been lines at all, and if I was the only one that considered Harry and I just friends anymore.

Liam burst out of his room, and Zayn ran after him. “Li don’t!” she pleaded.

He looked back to the bathroom door, and then to me. His voice was low, but angry. “You promised, Lou. When I told you to spare judgment, I didn’t mean for you two to get involved! I thought you were just friends!”

“We are,” I said, shaken by his surprise attack.

“No, you’re not!” he fumed.

Zayn touched his shoulder. “Baby, I told you it will be fine.”

He pulled away from her grip. “Why are you pushing this, Z? I told you what’s going to happen!”

He grabbed his face with both hands. “And I told you it won’t! Don’t you trust me?”

Liam sighed, looked at her, at me, and then stomped into his room.

Zayn fell into the recliner beside me, and puffed. “I just can’t get it into his head that whether you and Harry work out or not, it won’t affect us. But he’s been burned too many times. He doesn’t believe me.”

“What are you talking about, Z? Harry and I aren’t together. We are just friends. You heard him earlier … he’s not interested in me that way.”

“You heard that?”

“Well, yeah.”

“And you believe it?”

I shrugged. “It doesn’t matter. It’ll never happen. He told me he doesn’t see me like that, anyway. Besides, he’s a total commitmentphobe, I’d be hard pressed to find a boy outside of you that he hasn’t slept with, and I can’t keep up with his mood swings. I can’t believe Liam thinks otherwise.”

“Because not only does he know Harry … he’s talked to Him, Lou.”

“What do you mean?”

“Z?” Liam called from the bedroom.

Zayn sighed. “You’re my best friend. I think I know you better than you know yourself sometimes. I see you two together, and the only difference between me and Liam, and you and Harry, is that we’re having sex. Other than that? No difference.”

“There is a huge, huge difference. Is Liam bringing home different people every night? Are you going to the party tomorrow to hang out with a guy with definite dating potential? You know I can’t get involved with Harry, Z. I don’t even know why we’re discussing it.”

Zayn’s expression turned to disappointment. “I’m not seeing things, Lou. You have spent almost every moment with him for the last month. Admit it, you have feelings for him.”

“Let it go, Zayn,” Harry said, tightening his towel around his waist.

Zayn and I jumped at the sound of Harry’s voice, and when my eyes met his, I could see the happiness was gone. He walked down the hall without another word, and Zayn looked at me with a sad expression.

“I think you’re making a mistake,” he whispered. “You don’t need to go that party to meet a guy, you’ve got one that’s crazy about you right here,” he said, leaving me alone.

I rocked in the recliner, letting everything that had happened in the last week replay in my mind. Liam was angry with me, Zayn was disappointed in me, and Harry … he went from being happier than I’d ever seen him to so offended that he was speechless. Too nervous to crawl into bed with him, I watched the clock change from minute to minute.

An hour had passed when Harry came out of his room and down the hall. When he rounded the corner, I expected him to ask me to come to bed, but he was dressed and had his bike keys in his hand. His sunglasses were hiding his eyes, and he popped a cigarette in his mouth before grabbing the knob of the door.

“You’re leaving?” I asked, sitting up. “Where are you going?”

“Out,” he said, yanking the door open, and then slamming it closed behind him.

I fell back in the recliner and huffed. I had somehow become the villain and had no idea how I’d managed to get there.

When the clock above the television read two a.m., I finally resigned myself to going to bed. The mattress was lonely without him, and the idea of calling his cell kept creeping into my mind. I had nearly fallen asleep when Harry’s motorcycle pulled into the parking lot. Two car doors shut shortly after, and then several pairs of footsteps climbed the stairs. Harry fumbled with the lock, and then the door opened. He laughed and mumbled, and then I heard not one, but two voices. Their giggling was interrupted by the distinct sound of kissing and moaning. My heart sank, and I was instantly angry that I felt that way. My eyes clenched shut when one of the boys squealed, and then I was sure the next sound was the three of them collapsing onto the couch.

I considered asking zayn for her keys, but Liam’s door was directly in view of the couch, and I couldn’t stomach witnessing the picture that went along with the noises in the living room. I buried my head under the pillow, and then shut my eyes when door popped open. Harry walked across the room, opened the top night-table drawer, picked through his bowl of condoms, and then shut the drawer, jogging down the hall. The boys giggled for what seemed like half an hour, and then it was quiet.

Seconds later, moans, humming, and shouting filled the apartment. It sounded as if a pornographic movie was being filmed in the living room. I covered my face with my hands, and shook my head. Whatever lines had blurred or disappeared in the last week, an impenetrable stone wall had gone up in their place. I shook off my ridiculous emotions, forcing myself to relax. Harry was Harry, and we were, without a doubt, friends, and only friends.

The shouting and other nauseating noises quieted down after an hour, followed by whining, and then grumbling by the men after being dismissed. Harry showered and then collapsed onto his side of the bed, turning his back to me. Even after his shower, he smelled like he’d drunk enough whiskey to sedate a horse, and I was livid that he’d driven his motorcycle home in such a state.

After the awkwardness faded and the anger weakened, I still couldn’t sleep. When Harry’s breaths were deep and even, I sat up to look at the clock. The sun was going to rise in less than an hour. I ripped the covers off of me, walked down the hall and took a blanket from the hall cabinet. The only evidence of Harry’s threesome was two empty condom packages on the floor. I stepped over them and fell into the recliner.

I closed my eyes. When I opened them again, Zayn and Liam were sitting quietly on the couch watching a muted television. The sun lit the apartment, and I cringed when my back complained at any attempted movement.

Zayn attention darted to me. “Lou?” He said, rushing to my side. He watched me with wary eyes. He was waiting for anger, or tears, or another emotionally charged outburst.

Liam looked miserable. “I’m sorry about last night, Lou. This is my fault.”

I smiled. “It’s okay, Li. You don’t have to apologize.”

Zayn and liam traded glances, and then he grabbed my hand. “Harry went to the store. He is … ugh, it doesn’t matter what he is. I packed your stuff, and I’ll take you to the dorms before he gets home so you don’t have to deal with him.”

It wasn’t until that moment that I felt like crying; I had been kicked out. I worked to keep my voice smooth before I spoke. “Do I have time to take a shower?”

Zayn shook her head. “Let’s just go, Lou I don’t want you to have to see him. He doesn’t deserve to—”

The door flew open, and Harry walked in, his arms lined with grocery sacks. He walked straight into the kitchen, furiously working to get the cans and boxes into the cabinets.

“When Bear wakes up, let me know, okay?” he said in a soft voice. “I got spaghetti, and pancakes, and strawberries, and that oatmeal shit with the chocolate packets, and he likes Fruity Pebbles cereal, right, Z?” he asked, turning.

When he saw me, he froze. After an awkward pause, his expression melted, and his voice was smooth and sweet. “Hey, Lou.”

I couldn’t have been more confused if I had woken up in a foreign country. Nothing made sense. At first I thought I had been evicted, and then Harry comes home with bags full of my favorite foods.

He took a few steps into the living room, nervously shoving his hands in his pockets. “You hungry, Bear? I’ll make you some pancakes. Or there’s uh … there’s some oatmeal. And I got you some of that pink foamy shit that girls shave with, and a hairdryer, and a … a … .just a sec, it’s in here,” he said, rushing to the bedroom.

The door opened and shut, and then he rounded the corner, the color gone from his face. He took a deep breath and his eyebrows pulled in. “Your stuff’s packed.”

I know,” I said.

“You’re leaving,” he said, defeated.

I looked at Zayn, who glowered at Harry as if he could kill him. “You actually expected him to stay?”

“Baby,” Liam whispered.

“Don’t fucking start with me,Li . Don’t you dare defend him to me,” Zayn seethed.

Harry looked desperate. “I am so sorry, Bear. I don’t even know what to say.”

“Come on, Lou ,” Zayn said. He stood and pulled on my arm.

Harry took a step, but Zayn pointed his finger at him. “So help me God, Harry! If you try to stop him, I will douse you with gasoline and light you on fire while you sleep!”

“Zayn” Liam said, sounding a bit desperate himself. I could see that he was torn between his cousin and the boy he loved, and I felt terrible for him. The situation was exactly what he had tried to avoid all along.

“I’m fine,” I said, exasperated by the tension in the room.

“What do you mean, you’re fine?” Liam asked, almost hopeful.

I rolled my eyes. “Harry brought guys home from the bar last night, so what?”

Zayn looked worried. “Huh-uh, Louis. Are you saying you’re okay with what happened?”

I looked to all of them. “Harry can bring home whoever he wants. It’s his apartment.”

Zayn stared at me as if I’d lost my mind, Liam was on the verge of a smile, and Harry looked worse than before.

“You didn’t pack your things?” Harry asked.

I shook my head and looked at the clock; it was after two in the afternoon. “No, and now I’m going to have to unpack it all. I still have to eat, and shower, and get dressed …” I said, walking into the bathroom. Once the door closed behind me, I leaned against it and slid down to the floor. I was sure I had pissed off Zayn beyond repair, but I’d made Liam a promise, and I intended to keep my word.

A soft knock on the door tapped above me. “Bear?” Harry said.

“Yeah?” I said, trying to sound normal.

“You’re staying?”

“I can go if you want me to, but a bet’s a bet.”

The door vibrated with the soft bump of Harry ’’ forehead against the door. “I don’t want you leave, but I wouldn’t blame you if you did.”

“Are you saying I’m released from the bet?”

There was a long pause. “If I say yes, will you leave?”

“Well, yeah. I don’t live here, silly,” I said, forcing a small laugh.

“Then no, the bet’s still in effect.”

I looked up and shook my head, feeling tears burn my eyes. I had no idea why I was crying, but I couldn’t stop. “Can I take a shower, now?”

“Yeah …” he sighed.

I heard Zayn’s shoes enter the hall and stomp by Harry. “You’re a selfish bastard,” he growled, slamming Liam’s door behind him

I pushed myself up from the floor, turned on the shower, and then undressed, pulling the curtain behind me.

After another knock on the door, Harry cleared his throat. “Lou? I brought some of your stuff.”

“Just set it on the sink. I’ll get it.”

Harry walked in and shut the door behind him. “I was mad. I heard you spitting out everything that’s wrong with me to Zayn and it pissed me off. I just meant to go out and have a few drinks and try to figure some things out, but before I knew it, I was piss drunk and those boys …” he paused. “I woke up this morning and you weren’t in bed, and when I found you on the recliner and saw the wrappers on the floor, I felt sick.”

“You could have just asked me instead of spending all that money at the grocery store just to bribe me to stay.”

“I don’t care about the money, Bear. I was afraid you’d leave and never speak to me again.”

I cringed at his explanation. I hadn’t stopped to think how it would make him feel to hear me talk about how wrong for me he was, and now the situation was too messed up to salvage.

“I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings,” I said, standing under the water.

“I know you didn’t. And I know it doesn’t matter what I say now, because I fucked things up … just like I always do.”

“H?”

“Yeah?”

“Don’t drive drunk on your bike anymore, okay?”

I waited for a full minute until he finally took a deep breath and spoke. “Yeah, okay,” he said, shutting the door behind him.


End file.
